


Infinitive

by yin_again



Category: The Avengers (2012)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-13
Updated: 2013-03-16
Packaged: 2017-12-05 03:40:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 20
Words: 24,732
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/718479
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yin_again/pseuds/yin_again
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Origin: 1425–75; late Middle English; Late Latin infīnītīvus: indefinite</p><p>After Jane Foster's death, Loki and Darcy enter into an arranged marriage.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. To Marry

Chapter One: To Marry

“Will you, Darcy Elizabeth Lewis, take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband?”

“I w-will,” Darcy said; her voice only shook a little.

“And will you, Loki Odinson, take this woman as your lawfully wedded wife?”

“I will,” Loki said.

The judge continued. “Then by the power vested in me by the State of New York and the Realm of Midgard, I now pronounce that you are husband and wife. Mr. Odinson, you may kiss your bride.

Loki reached across and lifted the veil from Darcy’s face, then leaned in to kiss her on the lips. It was a short, firm kiss, and as he pulled away, the judge spoke the final words of the ceremony. “Ladies and gentlemen, I am proud to be the first to introduce Mr. and Mrs. Loki Odinson.”

Darcy hid a small wince. By Asgardian tradition, her name was not to be Darcy Odinson. If someone wanted to be precise, her name was Darcy Andrewsdottir, but really, since the only thing she even knew about her real father was his name, that was not happening. She was sticking with Lewis. At the ceremony in Asgard she’d go with anything Loki wanted. Whatever.

The guests stood and applauded, and Darcy took Loki’s arm and walked back up the aisle at his side.

~*~

The reception felt interminable. As a Tony and Pepper Stark Production™, it was lavish and beautiful and awesome, and _way_ too long. Finally, people quit hugging her (which was uncomfortably yanking her hair by her headpiece every. Single. Time.), and one of Tony’s elegant cars took them to the very best hotel Tony owned.

They were shown to the honeymoon suite, and Darcy immediately changed from her too-poofy dress into sweatpants and a tee shirt. She washed her face and brushed her hair out, then went into the bedroom. Once there, she crawled in under the covers.

After switching off the bedside light, she lay on her back, staring up at the ceiling. When, she thought, had this become her life? She spared a quick thought for Loki, then immediately dismissed it. The sofa in the living room was plenty long enough for him to sleep on.


	2. To Hurt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jane was supposed to stay in her lab and invent shit that let them go to other realms, and to be there. Darcy felt that people should stay where you left them

It was a building’s fault that Darcy and Loki got married. Well, technically it was due to a third-tier supervillan who just happened to have a bomb. Just a regular, ordinary, conventional bomb. Which he dropped onto Building Six on the SHEILD campus.

And killed Jane Foster.

New York was getting fairly regularly destroyed; someone had to eventually get hurt, but not Jane. Never Jane. Jane was supposed to stay in her lab and invent shit that let them go to other realms, and to _be_ there. Darcy felt that people should stay where you left them. But there they were, Darcy and Jane and two baby SHIELD agents, picking their way through the halls of SHEILD. The halls were actually _slanted_ in several places.

Darcy and the babies had met up in one of the weird pockets that weren’t damaged, and she’d pushed them down the hall to Jane’s lab. Where Jane was. Where Jane was _alive._ Jane hugged Darcy, and then led them through a warren of halls until they scrambled up to the street.

Darcy climbed onto a pile of girders and stuff, trying to get a view of where they were and where they could be safe. Half a second later, the little shelter where Jane and the babies were waiting was…was… _crushed_ by about half of the building next to them as it just collapsed.

When Darcy turned toward the noise, she was instantly blown off her vantage point. The last thing she remembered was screaming Jane’s name just before everything went dark.

~*~

SHEILD Medical was in Building 14, about seven floors underground. Darcy was in a bed. There were needles in her arms, and the room was dim and quiet aside from the low beep of the heart monitor. She tried to take a little inventory of her body. Big bandage wrapped around her head, another at her neck; both hands were wrapped. Tilting her head was agony, but she had to look down at her legs. Left in a full cast, in traction. The right was under her blanket, and when she tried to wiggle her toes, pain shot up to her lower back. Okay, she thought, not paralyzed. Not blind. No obvious giant wounds to her abdomen.

Darcy started when a rough palm touched her forehead. “Ow,” she croaked, her throat parched. The hand moved away and came back with a cup and straw.

“Drink slowly,” the person next to her said. She thought it was Tony.

“Okay,” she said, her voice better but still harsh. “Tony?”

“I’m with ya, kid,” he said. “You scared us. You’ve been out for eight days.” He looked at his watch. “Nine now.”

“Fuck. Is everyone okay?” She didn’t know, couldn’t remember. There had been a bomb. And running. And crashing. And little hallways that lead from Jane’s lab. She could feel tears slipping down her face. “Jane?” she finally choked out.

Tony’s hand touched her upper arm. “I’m sorry, Darce. She didn’t make it.”

Darcy just looked at the ceiling, tears sheeting down her face like rain. Tony’s hand came back with a soft, cool cloth, and he gently wiped her face. “You tried to get to her,” Tony said, his voice deeply sad but also a little admiring. “You’ve barely got any skin left on your hands, and you broke every single one of your fingertips.”

Darcy looked down at her wrapped hands. “For nothing, I guess. Oh, god.”

Tony squeezed her arm very softly. “You tried. Really hard. We had to drag you away. There just wasn’t any chance.” He pushed the button to raise her a little, then wiped her face again.

“Everybody else?” Darcy choked out.

“Cap broke his leg in about four places, but he’s already almost healed. Clint’s got a hell of a concussion. Natasha broke her hand punching the lead bad guy in the face. Broke his nose, shattered his cheekbone, and knocked out about a third of his teeth. Girl can hit.” Tony let out a little whistle of approval.

“And?” Darcy said.

This time Tony sighed and scrubbed a hand over his face. “We can’t find Bruce. I mean, he’s not killable, so he’s out there somewhere. Coulson lost a kidney – blunt force trauma to his abdomen. Fury broke both arms. Maria Hill is dead.”

“Thor?”

“In Asgard. He’s – not unexpectedly – devastated.” Tony rubbed his hand over his face again. “I’ve got a lot of lower-body lacerations from when he peeled me out of the Mark IX like a sardine.”

Darcy swallowed hard. She knew she had to ask one more question. “How many agents?”

“46 dead, 102 wounded, and another 80 missing, presumed dead. SHEILD really took a hit on this one.” Tony paused. “I’m really sorry about Jane. I know the two of you were close.”

“Yeah,” Darcy said. “I need more pa…”

“Here ya go,” Tony said, wedging the button for her morphine drip so she could push it with her elbow. “Want me to hit you up before I go?”

“Yeah,” Darcy said. “I wanna be asleep some more.”

Tony brushed the backs of his fingers down her cheek. “I know. I’ll check on you later.” 

~*~

The pain woke Darcy. It took her a minute to figure out what was going on. When reality hit her in the face, she moved her elbow and tried to find the button for the morphine pump. 

“I got it.”

This time it was Clint sitting next to her. “Hey,” he said, holding the cup out to her. She drank, and then sighed as the painkillers flooded into her.

Clint set the cup aside. “Don’t get too attached to the morphine,” he said. “They’ll start weaning you off it soon.” When she made a small sound of dismay, he patted her good leg softly. “You don’t want to get dependent on it, trust me,” he said, frowning. “The withdrawal is a bitch.”

By that she understood that he’d experienced that one himself, and she appreciated the care and concern. She still wanted to keep her drugs, though.

“How’s your head?” Darcy asked, remembering Tony’s report of Clint’s concussion.

He rubbed his forehead. “Fuckin’ hurts. It’s better than it was, though. How are you doing?”

Darcy gave a short laugh, then immediately stopped as pain from ten or twelve sites on her body hit her. “Hopped up on morphine,” she said. “I know what Tony said, but I don’t remember much of what happened.”

Clint patted her leg again. “It’ll come back,” he said soothingly.

Darcy closed her eyes and swallowed heavily. Tears welled up. “I...I think I don’t want it to.” As the tears fell, Clint leaned awkwardly down to her. Darcy pressed her face to his shoulder. “I don’t want to remember.”

Clint managed to rub his thumb over her cheekbone without hurting her. “I know. I know.”

~*~

It did come back, wanted or not. On her fifth day in the hospital, Loki showed up with a very nice little old lady called Eir. While Loki waited in the hall, Eir laid her soft, warm hands on various parts of Darcy’s body and healed the injuries one by one.

“Did Thor send you? Is he okay?” Darcy asked.

Eir nodded sadly. “He is nearly inconsolable. And angry with himself that he took this long to send me.”

“Oh, please,” Darcy said. “He’s saving me weeks in the hospital and months of recovery. I hope he’ll visit soon. I need about a million Thor-hugs.”

“If he cannot bring himself to visit, he will likely call upon Loki to bring you and the others.”

Darcy smiled sadly. “Is there any way to heal my brain so I don’t remember what happened?”

Eir smoothed Darcy’s hair back gently. “Not that I know of,” she said. “Besides, you need to grieve for your friends in order to move on. That cannot happen without remembering. Now,” she said. “I will visit the others. Be well, Lady Darcy, and know that you have the condolences of all of Asgard.”

Darcy swallowed back tears at Eir’s gentle statement. “Thank you,” she said. “Thank you so much.”

Eir smiled, then walked to the door. She turned back to Darcy. “You will need strength in the coming days; this was the very least I could do.” she said.

After Eir had gone, Darcy moved and stretched every part of her body that had been injured. Only then did she remember Eir’s words. What was she going to need strength for? What did ‘in the coming days’ mean? She hated cryptic gods and goddesses.


	3. To Propose

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Neither realm wishes to wait; therefore, I must marry. A human of all things.”
> 
> *Caroline Lakehurst has been borrowed with permission from the wonderful [shrewreadings](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Shrewreadings/pseuds/Shrewreadings).

It turned out that Eir was right. Really right. Exceptionally right, dammit. While Darcy was at home recovering, her department had been moved to Building Four. Building Six had been mostly destroyed, and a demolitions crew had done the rest after the search-and-recovery teams left.

“Ms. Lewis,” Coulson said from the door. Eir had healed him, too. She had grown him a new frickin’ kidney, and that was freaky. But, Coulson was back to his old stone-faced self, which made it okay. “Can you come with me?”

Darcy followed him, wondering if this was about being back at work sooner than her bosses wanted. But sitting at home was killing her, and the SHEILD psychiatrist she’d been seeing three times a week agreed that getting back into a routine could only help.

They stopped at a conference room and Coulson ushered her in. The only other person in the room was – of all people – good old Loki of Asgard himself. Even though Loki had repented and served some sort of penance or whatever back home, he still made her a tiny bit nervous, plus she’d kind of had a little I-like-bad-boys-and-whoa-is-he-bad crush on him even though he’d destroyed, well, everything. She wasn’t a chicken, though. “Hey,” she said. “I never got to thank you for bringing Eir. So, er, thank you.”

“Thor’s doing,” Loki said, waving a dismissive hand. “I will relay your thanks.”

“Have a seat, Ms. Lewis,” Coulson said, gesturing to a seat across the table from Loki. Coulson took the seat next to Darcy.

“What’s this about?” Darcy asked. She was feeling a bit suspicious.

Coulson looked from her to Loki and back. “As you know,” he said, “Thor and Dr. Foster were engaged to be married.”

“Duh,” Darcy said. “Everyone on and off Earth knows that.” The marriage between Jane Foster and the Crown Prince of Asgard had been turned into a diplomatic opportunity and media circus, with Odin declaring that the marriage would seal the alliance between Asgard and Midgard that would provide Earth a powerful ally and Asgard arc reactor technology. With the Bifrost repairs going slowly, Odin was eager to replace dark energy as a power source. Its price was much too high in many ways.

When Darcy said that everyone knew, she hadn’t been kidding – newspapers, magazines, news shows, _everyone_ had reported the story for months after the engagement. The wedding was just six months away when Jane…when SHEILD was attacked.

Coulson looked at Loki.

“You were no doubt privy to the details regarding the alliance,” Loki said, sounding bored. When Darcy nodded, he continued. “Thor,” he said, now sounding annoyed, “has invoked deep mourning.”

“And that means?”

“He is exempt from choosing a new bride for one hundred years.” Loki rolled his eyes.

“Okay…” Darcy said. “What does this have to do with me?”

Coulson sighed and looked her in the eye. “The alliance can’t be finalized without a marriage.”

Darcy shrugged. “So, in 100 years Thor gets married. What of it?”

Coulson opened his mouth to answer, but Loki broke in. “Neither realm wishes to wait; therefore, I must marry. A _human_ of all things.”

Another sigh from Darcy. “I still don’t get it.”

Loki gave her a look like she was being willfully dim. “Darcy Lewis,” he said, not bothering to hide his annoyance. “Will you marry me?”

~*~

“Do not fight me on this, Loki,” Odin said, glowering at his son. “There must be a union, and Darcy Lewis of Midgard is one of the few who are versed in Asgardian culture and the… _intricacies_ of our family in particular. An agreement between you solves the problem and continues the diplomatic process.”

Loki narrowed his eyes, “And if I decline?”

Odin’s voice was clear and strong. “You will not decline.”

~*~

“You don’t have to do this, Ms. Lewis,” Coulson said. “Though a marriage would solve a number of problems, you are not in any way obligated.”

“At least one of us isn’t,” Loki muttered.

“What?” Darcy said, coming out of her shock. “What does that mean?”

“My King commands,” Loki said. “And I obey.”

Darcy rolled her eyes at him. “Since when?”

Loki didn’t answer, but his eyes went hard.

Coulson cleared his throat. “Loki has been…restored to his place in the royal family, but he has to…”

“Be _good_ ,” Loki says, spitting out the word ‘good’ like it tasted bad.

“Ah,” Darcy said, and she actually sympathized with him. ‘Be good’ was an admonishment she’d chafed under for most of her life. “I assume there’s a contract involved?”

Coulson handed her a manila folder. “We’ve already had Legal go through it.”

“Yeah.” Darcy snorted. “I’m sure you have. I have someone else I’d like to take a look at it.”

Coulson frowned a tiny bit at her. “I’m sure I don’t have to tell you how classified this is, right? It cannot leave the building.”

“I’m not an idiot, Phil,” Darcy snapped. She did not need to be condescended to on top of everything. “The person I want to look over it is _in_ Legal. I’m leaving now.” She swept out of the room, and slammed the door behind her.

~*~

Darcy knocked on the closed door in the middle of SHEILD Legal.

A voice came from behind the door, and Darcy took it as a “come in”. Behind the desk sat Caroline Lakehurst, one of the legal advisors to the Avengers, and Darcy’s friend.

Caroline started, and the shredded lettuce on the sub she’d just bitten into cascaded onto her ample cleavage.

“Sorry,” Darcy said. “My bad.”

Caroline chewed her mouthful and brushed the lettuce off her front, stopping to pull a couple of shreds out of her bra. She waved Darcy to her visitor’s chair. Darcy sat and waited until Caroline swallowed and took a sip of her soda.

“Okay,” Caroline said, turning her sharp eyes on Darcy. “What or whom did you break? Are we talking misdemeanor or felony here?”

Darcy had to laugh, but she could hear it turning high and a little bit hysterical. Caroline wordlessly slid the other half of her sandwich across the desk and turned her bag of chips to face Darcy.

They ate in silence, Darcy realizing that she was _starving_ , practically inhaling her share of the food.

“Better?” Caroline said, passing a napkin across the desk.

“Yeah,” Darcy said. “No. Look at this.” She passed the manila folder over. She sat back in her chair, forcing herself not to fidget while she waited.

Caroline made it through the first couple of pages before she looked up. “This is a joke, right? This is Coulson getting me back for the thing with the sticky notes.”

“Not a joke,” Darcy said.

“You are _not_ signing this.” Caroline shook the folder at her.

“I know it’s bad, but, you know, humanity and all.” Darcy put her hands over her face.

Caroline threw the folder into her trashcan. “No. I mean _you are not signing this_.”

Darcy lunged and pulled the folder out of the trash. It only had a little mustard on it. “I know. I’m an affront to every one of my feminist ideals.” She clutched the folder in both hands, wrinkling it. “But it really is a ‘fate of humanity’ deal. Not doing this could fuck up the whole Midgard/Asgard alliance. If we piss them off, they might turn us all into frogs or mudskippers or something.”

“What’s a mudskipper?” Caroline looked confused.

“It’s one of those fish that can live on land and on water and they kinda skip across the mud. Hence the name. I don’t want to be a frog or a mudskipper, and I don’t want to let the whole planet down.” By the end of her explanation, Darcy was verging on hysteria again.

“God, chill out.” Caroline said. “You’re making me worry about being a mudskipper, and I don’t even know what one looks like. Gimme the folder.” At Darcy’s look, she added, “I promise not to throw it away.” At Darcy’s next look, Caroline said, “Or set it on fire or throw it out the window or attempt to destroy it in any way.” She held up her hand with the first two fingers crossed. “Lawyer’s honor.”

By the time Caroline had gone through the entire document, scribbling notes in her indecipherable shorthand, Darcy had chewed off both of her thumbnails.

“Don’t bite your nails,” Caroline said. “You want my objections alphabetically or just in order of horribleness?”

“Horribleness, please.” Darcy sat on her hands to keep her nails out of her mouth.

“All right,” Caroline said, folding her hands on her desk, looking like she wanted to bite her own nails. “There’s no opt-out clause, so no divorce. You’re signing your entire life away, unless you intend to live to 122. There are no specifications regarding breach of contract.”

“That means having an affair or something, right? Not a problem – I bet if you cheat on Loki you might as well go ahead and turn _yourself_ inside out.” Darcy couldn’t see bringing that level of wrath down on her head, no matter how horny she got. “What else?”

Caroline looked down at her notes. “It doesn’t specify living arrangements. Are you going to let him just drag you around wherever he goes? He could take you to Jotenheim or some realm that rains acid or worse.”

Darcy frowned. “What’s worse than raining acid?”

“Raining lava,” Caroline deadpanned.

“Point. What else?” With this much sarcasm in one small office, Darcy knew this was going to take a while.

Caroline raised an eyebrow. “No monetary compensation.”

“Wouldn’t that be prostitution?” Darcy asked.

“Depends on where you do it.” Caroline carried on with her list. “There are no provisions for if _he_ dies, even if it’s unlikely, but he’s pretty good at pissing off the wrong people. There’s nothing about any ceremonial or royal duties on Asgard. You do get to be a princess, though, if that’s your kind of thing.”

“Do I have to have sex with him?” Darcy wasn’t sure how to feel about that. Magic sex was probably awesome, and she was still nursing that bad-boy-crush-thingie, but contractually obligated sex didn’t sound all that appealing.

“Well, he is kind of hot, but the only provision is that ‘the marriage must be consummated’. So, at least once.” Caroline tapped the contract emphatically. “You also need an abuse clause – physical, mental, verbal, magical: any of those should void the contract. There should be a provision for unlimited communication with your SHEILD handler, of course, and where any offspring will be placed in the line of succession.”

“The fuck you say!” Darcy nearly shouted. “There will be no ‘offspring’. I’m not mixing my DNA with that bucket of crazy no matter how adorable the babies would be. That’s just not fair to the universe.”

“Point.” Caroline gave Darcy a sympathetic look. “You want me to draft a counteroffer?”

Darcy sighed. “Please. And maybe a promise to help me through this?”

“You’ve got it. I’ll have the papers to you tomorrow. Let me know if you need representation at the meeting.” Caroline tapped the folder on the desk to align the papers.

“Thank you. Now maybe I’ll be able to sleep tonight.” Darcy didn’t really think so, though.

Caroline smiled tightly. “Take an Ambien like everyone else does. Also, call your shrink.”

At that, Darcy had to laugh. “Where do you think I’m going after this?” 

~*~

In her shrink’s office, Darcy liked to lie in the chair upside down, with her feet at the headrest and her head hanging off the edge of her seat. At first, Dr. Thompson thought it was some sort of silent disapproval of therapy, but it really was that Darcy just liked sitting that way sometimes. She sometimes liked sleeping with her head at the foot of the bed and sitting on the backs of chairs or couches with her feet on the seat, too. Perspective. It also wasn’t a posture that was conducive for crying, so she found it comforting, since she’d shed all the tears she thought she possibly could for Jane.

Today she sat upright on the chair, butt all the way to the edge, and her clasped hands on her knees.

Dr. Thompson had already been briefed on “the deal”.

“How are you holding up, Darcy? It’s a lot of pressure.” Thompson usually had that neutral therapy-voice, but now she sounded genuinely worried.

“Well,” Darcy said. “I made them let me get the contract looked over by a friend in Legal; she’s writing up a counteroffer.”

Thompson smiled. “Taking control – that’s good.”

Darcy gave a shrill titter that she’d rather have kept inside. “I slammed out of the conference room with Coulson and Loki still in there. It was pretty empowering.”

They talked for two whole hours, and Darcy laughed a little, cried a lot, and managed to get a little bit of perspective.


	4. To Discuss

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I don’t want you to be able to drag me around the Realms if I don’t want to go. Like anyplace where it rains lava or acid or something.”

The next day, Darcy, Coulson, Caroline and Loki sat down for a chat. Caroline didn’t bat an eyelash when she was introduced to Loki, just slid into her chair and passed out copies of the new agreement.

Coulson read it through, then read the first page again. “No opt-out,” Coulson said. “The contract was originally for Jane and Thor, and he planned to make her an Aesir. However, Odin likes the contract the way it is on the opt-out. He won’t budge.” Coulson gave Darcy what might have been the shadow of a sliver of a sympathetic smile.

“Breach of contract?” Caroline said, looking around the table.

Loki spoke up. “No. Cultural issue.”

Darcy looked across at him. “Yeah, like there’s no adultery in Asgard.”

Loki stared at her. “Not in any marriage to which I am party. Non-negotiable.”

“Living arrangements?” Darcy asked.

Again Loki answered. “What?”

“I don’t want you to be able to drag me around the Realms if I don’t want to go. Like anyplace where it rains lava or acid or something.” She crossed her arms over her chest.

“You will not be compelled to visit any place against your will; you have my word and the word of the AllFather.” Loki sounded a bit affronted that the question was even in play. 

Caroline broke in. “And both of those signatures on the final document.”

Coulson cleared his throat. “SHEILD will continue to pay you a salary, but Loki is responsible for housing on Earth and other realms, as well as living expenses.”

Loki placed his copy of the paperwork on the desk. “I am quite insulted by the insinuations contained in the ‘abuse’ clause.” 

“Get over it,” Darcy said. “I have to be able to protect myself. The unlimited communication with my SHEILD handler stays, too.”

Loki leaned forward and put his elbows on the table. “The consummation clause remains – also cultural. As for offspring, I don’t believe our biologies are compatible anyway, but all contraception measures will be taken.”

“And if there is an unintended pregnancy?” Caroline spoke again, and Darcy wanted to kick her. Caroline ignored her. “There should be an option for termination at Darcy’s – and _only_ Darcy’s - discretion.”

“Termination?” Loki said, looking taken aback. “You people would destroy life before it is viable? You truly are barbarians.”

Caroline turned on him. “Right, and there were no pregnant women among the people you killed on your previous visits to our ‘barbarian’ planet?”

Loki actually drew back into his chair under the weight of the combined glares being aimed at him. “Fine,” he said faintly.

“What about if Loki dies before me?” At his look, Darcy continued. “I know it’s unlikely, but you do have a talent for pissing off guys even more deranged than you.”

“And what is it you would want at the time of my untimely demise, Ms. Lewis?” Loki’s gaze was sharp.

“My freedom from this contract. ‘Til death do us part, right? There’s nothing that says it has to be _my_ death.” Darcy held his gaze. “Agreed?”

Loki rolled his eyes. “Agreed. If we are finished here…”

“One more thing,” Darcy said. “Murder clause.”

Caroline snickered. “Worst Christmas ever.”

Darcy rolled her eyes. “He murders anybody and I’m out.”

Loki looked at her like she was insane. “You will not take away my ability to protect myself and my family because of your silly human sensibilities!”

“Easy there, war machine.” Darcy put her hands on her hips. “I specifically said murder. As in the willful taking of another’s life just because you feel like it.”

“She means ‘any killing which is deliberate and premeditated or planned’,” Caroline said.

“That includes invasions.” Darcy gave Loki a hard look. “Cultural. Non-negotiable.”

“Fine.” Loki said, leaning back in his chair.

“Final draft tomorrow. We’ll need Odin’s signature notarized. I’m assuming you’re going there rather than him coming here?” Caroline asked Loki.

“Of course,” Loki said, rolling his eyes. Then he disappeared.

“I hate it when he does that,” Coulson said. “Anything else?”

Caroline said, “Nope,” and slipped out, leaving Darcy and Coulson together.

Before he could leave, Darcy said, “Two requests.”

“Name them.” Coulson looked calm as always.

“Be my handler,” Darcy said, and he nodded. “And walk me down the aisle.”

Darcy hadn’t thought that under that laced-up, emotionally constipated exterior was a guy who was even capable of tearing up, and she’d also underestimated the awesomeness of his hugs.


	5. To Report

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “This ‘media’ that you seem to care for so much appears to be made up exclusively of bilgesnipe.” Loki said.

Transcript of interview with Darcy Lewis

by Christine Everhart, _Vanity Fair_

Christine Everhart: Thanks for letting _Vanity Fair_ have your first interview after the big announcement.

Darcy Lewis: Oh, no problem. Since you boned Tony and all, he and Pepper figured you wouldn’t freak me out too much. Last time someone freaked me out, it was Thor, and I tased him.

CE: So I’ve heard. How is Thor doing?

DL: He’s okay, I guess. He’s been really torn up since…

CE: Since Ms. Foster died?

DL: Dr. Foster.

 CE: Really, do you think she cares now?

 DL: I care. The people who love her care. She worked incredibly hard for those doctorates, and she deserves respect. My best friend deserves respect, dead or alive.

 CE: Oh. I’m sorry. And sorry for your loss.

 DL: Thanks. And Thor’s devastated. We all are.

CE: Let’s move on. Is there any reason your fiancé isn’t joining in on your interview? 

DL: He’s…not very patient with questions he thinks are stupid, and that’s pretty much all of them.

CE: I see. So stepping into an arranged marriage must be strange for you, I mean, marrying a stranger…

DL: He’s not a stranger. Okay, he’s kind of strange. But we’ve known each other for a while.

CE: So you were friends.

DL: Maybe ‘acquaintances’ is a better word. We’re friends now.

CE: But an arranged marriage…do you think it will turn into a love match?

DL: Who knows? We’re both committed to making it work.

Loki Odinson appears in the room.

LO: Oh, interview.

DL: Yeah. This is Christi…

LO: This is the one that, as you so delicately put it, ‘boned’ Stark? Mrs. Stark is much more attractive.

DL: Yup. You want to hang?

LO: No. 

Loki Odinson disappears. 

DL: Sorry, he doesn’t really like the media part yet. He’s going to have to learn, I guess. I don’t think that everyone really wants to talk to me all the time.

CE: When is the wedding?

DL: Weddings, plural. We’ll do something small and private here, then something a bit more grand in Asgard.

CE: Will there be media coverage there? Maybe just a select few?

DL (laughing): Dude, I think the AllFather can stop your heart with barely a twitch – I don’t see him holding a press conference! Besides, Asgard doesn’t need media. It’s a royal court, so I’m guessing that everything is pretty much covered by gossip. There are way fewer Aesir than humans – they’re a close community. They’re pretty private with outsiders.

CE: Have you been there?

DL: Not yet. I think I’ll need some ‘royalty training’ before I meet the in-laws.

CE: Had Ms…Dr. Foster been there?

DL: Yeah, a couple of times. Everybody loved her there.

CE: I know that you and Mr. Odinson have signed contracts regarding the marriage. Any insights into that you’d like to give our readers?

DL: Oh, hell no! That information is _so_ classified. It’s also nobody’s business but ours.

Loki Odinson appears.

LO: We have an appointment.

CE: Are you sure you won’t stay for a couple of questions?

LO: Positive. Darcy?

DL: Bye, Christine. It was nice meeting you!

LO wraps his arms around DL and they both vanish.

Assistant: That was the weirdest fucking thing I ever saw. Also, you boned Tony Stark, too?

CE: Shut up. 

~*~

_From Tmz.com_

**Loveless Marriage for Midgard’s Sweethearts?**

Is the arranged union between sweet, bubbly Darcy Lewis and her ‘tall, dark, and scary’ Prince Loki of Asgard in trouble before it begins? Last night the couple was spotted on the red carpet at the Steve Rogers Benefit for Homeless Veterans, one of Captain America’s pet projects. While Darcy was the belle of the ball, being photographed with Tony and Pepper Stark and other notables, the Prince ducked the cameras altogether with a sour look on his face. Not that that’s anything new for the “reformed” supervillain. 

Sources say that the soon-to-be Mr. and Mrs. Odinson appeared to mostly stay on opposite sides of the party. On her side was laughing and dancing, along with an extended turn around the room on Rogers’ arm to charm donations out of the guests.

The taciturn Mr. Odinson stayed in the shadows, and the only ones brave enough to approach him were The Avengers and an occasional waiter. The groom-in-waiting barely cracked a smile; his only change of expression came when Tony Stark joined him for a quick conversation that was probably quite racy, knowing Stark’s bawdy sense of humor.

Two hours into the party, Odinson walked across the room, gathered his laughing fiancée into his arms and disappeared. Must be a great way to travel – no traffic, no smelly cabs.

We’ll be keeping an eye on this pair. You never know what could happen before the wedding!

~*~

In a fit of pique, Loki threw his StarkPad over his shoulder; Pepper fielded it deftly without even spilling a drop of her coffee.

“This ‘media’ that you seem to care for so much appears to be made up exclusively of bilgesnipe.” Loki said.

Pepper made a humming noise as she looked at her own StarkPad and Loki’s side by side. “We sometimes call them ‘vultures’.”

“What is a…” Pepper handed Loki’s tablet back over his shoulder. “Oh,” Loki said, looking at the screen. “I suppose that’s suitably disgusting.”

“They say nice things about Darcy,” Tony said from the other side of the table. “She looks even better opposite you, cloudy day. You need some media training.”

Loki scowled at Tony. “These people say plenty of negative things about you.”

“I’m charismatic, though. They see me as a charming bad boy.” Tony said. “They see you as a crabby megalomaniac. These are very different things. Pep, you should call my guy, the…”

“Media consultant,” Pepper said, topping off her cup of coffee and handing the carafe to Tony. “3:30 this afternoon, here. Stylist at five. Dinner with Darcy at Dashio after.”

“And that’s why she’s in charge of Stark Industries,” Tony said, beaming. “Dashio is genius – private-ish, but a couple of paps will have it staked out. Loki’s going to need date training, too.”

“I have impeccable manners, you heathens.” Loki glared.

“Yes,” Tony said drily. “You always send a nice fruit basket after you conqueror a planet.”

~*~

Media training for Loki was largely unnecessary. Loki Silvertongue could come out to play anytime he wanted to – he just usually didn’t want to.

“This is ridiculous,” Loki said after the third time he lifted the trainer off the floor by his neck. “Someone take this little man away before I do it via those very expensive windows that you’ve so recently had replaced.”

“Okay,” Tony said. “Just put the man down.” Once the trainer’s feet hit the floor, Tony waved him off. The man actually _scurried_ away and out the door.

“Sit,” Tony said. When Loki glared at him, he glared back. “Seriously, sit the fuck down. You and I need to have a talk.”

“‘Birds and bees’ or ‘shovel’?” Loki sneered, but he did sit down.

“Neither, and I’ve upgraded the shovel talk to include tactical nuclear weapons and the wrath of Pepper Stark.” Loki actually blanched.

Tony grabbed his scotch and sat down across from Loki. He put on his ‘welcome to my meeting: I can buy and sell you a thousand times before breakfast and a thousand more after my second cup of coffee’ face.

“Media,” he said. “Specifically live interviews that both you and Darcy are attending.”

Loki rolled his eyes.

“You can’t go in there and sit around looking like you’d rather be somewhere else.” Tony took a sip of his scotch and waited.

“I _would_ rather be somewhere else.” Loki didn’t disappoint.

Tony drained his glass and set it aside. It clattered a bit as it hit the table hard. “Look, you asshole, this is important. People love a love story. They love being able to see a picture on Tumblr or Facebook of the two of you holding hands so they can make little squeaky noises over how sweet you are.”

Loki rolled his eyes again and crossed his arms over his chest, belligerent.

“Don’t give me that look. I know this isn’t something you wanted to do, but Darcy didn’t either.” Tony sighed. “You’re treating her like shit. She’s used to it in private, but she doesn’t need to be publically embarrassed by a fiancée who obviously hates her." 

Loki frowned, and Tony continued. “Try to think about someone other than yourself for a minute. She already feels like she’s signed her life away – which she _has_ – the least you can do, and I know you always do the least you can do, is make it where she doesn’t have to apologize for your dickishness in every interview.”

Tony leaned forward and placed his hands on his knees, looking Loki right in the eyes. “So, what I’m saying here is suck it up, get your head out of your ass, and don’t humiliate a girl who’s just trying to do the right thing for her goddamn planet and the memory of her dead best friend.”

Loki just blinked at him.

Tony stood up and brushed his suit pants down. “Now,” he said. “I’m going to get Darcy and Pepper, and we’re going to go get ice cream, and you are not fucking invited.”


	6. To Dine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As Happy was pulling away from the curb, Loki dropped her hand. “I trust my performance was adequate?” he said, facing forward.

When Darcy slid into the limo, she was a little surprised to see Loki there waiting for her. “I figured you’d just poof on over, or skip it altogether.”

“Did you truly think that I would skip our dinner engagement?” Loki’s eyebrows drew together slightly.

“Yes,” Darcy said, and she meant it.

He frowned harder. “Why?”

She blew out a breath. “Seriously, Loki? At this point I wouldn’t put anything past you.”

“I…” he said, then blew out his own breath. “I have not been…helpful in regards to the media situation.”

Darcy leveled a look at him from over the top of her glasses’ frames. “Ya’ think?”

“I will endeavor to perform adequately in future,” he said.

Darcy straightened her top as they pulled up at the restaurant. “I will endeavor to believe it when I see it,” she muttered. Just before Happy opened the car’s door, she rolled her lips together to smooth her lipstick, finishing off with a quiet pop. “We’re on.”

Happy handed her out of the car and passed her off to Loki, who had come around the car from the other side. He took her hand and linked it through his arm. As Tony’d said, there were only two photographers lounging near the door, but they quickly straightened and tossed their cigarettes away when they recognized Loki and Darcy. Strobe flashes followed them into the restaurant.

Loki was _perfect_. His manners truly befitted a prince. Darcy tried to keep her amazement off her face and smile fondly at him as though this were always the case.

“Did you enjoy your ice cream outing with Tony and Pepper?” Loki asked, once they were settled and their drink orders taken.

Darcy was startled a bit. “Um, yeah. It was awesome. Tony ordered every flavor of ice cream to try and wound up liking the vanilla best. Pepper had this big float-y thing with coffee and chocolate.” She felt like she was babbling a bit, but Loki was practically hanging on her every silly word about ice cream, and he was smiling. _Sweetly_. It was nearly overwhelming.

“And you?” Loki asked.

“I couldn’t decide, so I invented a banana-brownie-split with super chocolate fudge ice cream, caramel and marshmallow toppings and whipped cream.” She sat back in her seat, basking in the memory of her creation. “It was so good.”

He laughed. Not a derisive smirk or a smug chuckle, but a real laugh. “What,” he asked. “No cherry on top?”

Darcy daringly lay her hand over his where it was lying on the table, and then eased it back just as quickly. “I thought that might be overkill.”

Loki’s laugh rang out in the restaurant. Once he caught his breath, he picked up Darcy’s hand and kissed the back of it. “My dear girl,” he said, his laughter tapering off, “Anything worth doing is worth overdoing. We’ll get the cherry next time.”

He was laughing. He was amused by her antics, not turning his nose up at her and being a dick. And his lips on the back of her hand had been soft and gentle, his warm breath gusting against her wrist.

The rest of dinner went the same way. He wasn’t over-the-top, but he was charming and attentive. He even stood up from the table when she got up to go to the ladies’ room, and he stood and held her chair when she came back. There were small touches – his hand on the small of her back, his fingers brushing hers on the crisp linen tablecloth – nothing overt, just the kinds of touches that couples gave each other.

When they got up to leave, Loki put his arm around her shoulders and tucked her neatly to his side. As they walked past the now-assembled horde of photographers, she looked up and smiled at him. He smiled back.

As Happy was pulling away from the curb, Loki dropped her hand. “I trust my performance was adequate?” he said, facing forward.

Oh. Performance – for a minute there it had been all too easy to believe that he…well, that it might have been even a little real. “Oscar-caliber,” she said, and she stared straight ahead, too.

Darcy checked her email before going to bed. Apparently, she and Loki were ‘now trending’, and she couldn’t _not_ click the link. The first photo was the one taken as they left the restaurant, with them smiling at each other, Happy and the car in the background. The caption said ‘Loki Odinson and Darcy Lewis: it looks like love.’

They weren’t wrong, but when your dinner date was the God of Lies, looks could be deceiving.


	7. To Work

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pepper cut her eyes at him. “Tony, you are a completely inept woo-er. Your version of wooing is ‘hey, cutie, you wanna come home with me and see where the magic happens?’” She did a passable impression of Tony’s voice.

“Okay, this is good,” Tony said at the breakfast table. He had Jarvis scanning all of the morning gossip shows, websites and social media, looking for mentions of Darcy and Loki. He poked at one of the small screens on the holographic display that was “sitting” in the center of the table.

_“We’re seeing some footage from last night outside Dashio, where Prince Loki of Asgard and Darcy Lewis had a quiet dinner together. Well, at least it was quiet until they left, right, Ben?”_

_“Thanks, Carrie. Yep, as you can see here, they exited the restaurant to a crowd of members of the media. They didn’t stop to speak, and they seemed so wrapped up in one another that Prince Loki didn’t even do his usual disappearing act. Back to you, Carrie.”_

_“Thanks, Ben. Well, we wish these two all the best as they head toward their historic marriage! Now, we take you to Eddie in the WeatherHappeningCenter 3500 to check out the latest_

Tony poked another window, showing a social media trending graph. “How we lookin’, Jar?”

“Ms. Lewis’ name recognition is in an upward trend of approximately 28% over yesterday, with higher numbers in Tweets and Tumblr. She has had more modest gains in Foursquare, Facebook and the various blogging sites, but I expect those will rise as the morning continues. Prince Loki’s name recognition is up 30-40% across all social media.”

“And the pics?” Tony said, taking a huge bite of his cereal.

The hologram shifted to a mosaic of photos. “More than 4 million hits online, and the photographs will appear in at least 3000 print sources today. The story and photos went out on the AP Wire before Ms. Lewis and Prince Loki even arrived back at the Tower last night.” If an AI could sound smug, Jarvis did.

Loki walked into the kitchen, looking sharp and collected as always. “What _is_ that?” he asked, pouring himself a cup of coffee and sliding into a chair at the table.

“Real-time media coverage of your Prom date. It’s looking good.” Tony used his dripping spoon to gesture toward the display. “The world seems to like you when you’re pretending to be decent.”

Loki swept the hologram off the table. “I _am_ decent.”

“No, you aren’t, so don’t bother – I can tell when you’re lying.” Tony grinned.

“How?” Loki asked.

“Because your lips are moving.”

“Very amusing, Stark,” Loki said sardonically. “Mrs. Stark? Do you have the list we discussed?”

“I do,” Pepper said. “But first, stop talking to me as if I work for you. I don’t.”

Loki rolled his eyes. “Had I but taken over this planet when I had the chance, you would _all_ work for me. That said, Mrs. Stark, would you please send me the list you so kindly compiled? 

“I will,” Pepper said, and she flicked a file across the room to his StarkPad. “Just study the script we worked out and you’ll do fine. You can’t just switch in mid-stream and start making yourself available after a month of doing nothing.” She moved to the table and sat beside Loki. “We have to work you up from a couple of drop-ins to an interview with both of you. We have to go slowly. There are a fair amount of reporters who have a keen eye for bullshit. This has to look like the two of you are starting a new phase of your relationship. You have to woo her.”

“Oh!” Tony said. “I can give you all kinds of wooing advice. I’m an excellent woo-er.”

Pepper cut her eyes at him. “Tony, you are a completely inept woo-er. Your version of wooing is ‘hey, cutie, you wanna come home with me and see where the magic happens?’” She did a passable impression of Tony’s voice.

Tony pointed at her. “That worked great for _years_.”

She sighed. “And what happened when you tried to woo me?”

“I flailed.” Tony put his hands over his eyes. “I freaked and asked you to marry me ten minutes into our first date.”

“Five,” Pepper said.

“Four point three,” Jarvis added.

“I rest my case,” Loki said. “I will handle the fake wooing for this fake romance leading to this very fake marriage.”

None of them noticed Darcy turn away from the door and walk quickly away.

~*~

“Ms. Lewis?” Jarvis said softly. “Shall I have Mr. Hogan meet you on the garage level?”

“That would be, um, thank you, Jarvis.” Her voice was only a bit shaky.

Happy had the car waiting, and held the door for her. There was a white paper cup steaming in the cup holder. She took a sip and moaned when she realized it was her favorite vanilla latte.

When Happy slipped into the driver’s seat, she caught his eye in the mirror. “Where did the coffee come from?”

He laughed and put the car in gear. “You remember that fancy coffee machine Mr. Stark kept breaking? It’s in my kitchen now. Only you and Mrs. Stark know about it.”

“No one will hear it from me,” Darcy said, crossing her heart even though he was pulling out into traffic and couldn’t see her. The coffee was good. That was as far as she let herself think. Good coffee. No thoughts of her stupid, stupid crush on Loki and her stupid, stupid belief that he might have some feelings for her, too.

~*~

“I’m off to SHEILD to work with Bruce for a while, need a ride?” Tony said.

“No,” Pepper said. “I’m working here today and do not want to be interrupted. Tony.”

“Okay, okay,” Tony held up his hands in surrender. “I promise not to come back ‘til two.”

“Five.” She kept a small frown on her face.

“Three?” Tony wheedled, though they both knew he’d lose track of time while he was doing science with Bruce and probably not make it back until midnight.

“Okay,” she said.

“Loki?” Tony turned around in his chair.

“I have a meeting with the new council and some Eastern European negotiators, so, yes.” Loki stood and placed his coffee mug in the sink, pointedly ignoring the one Tony held out toward him.

“Fine,” Tony huffed, putting his own mug away. “Jarvis?”

“Yes, sir?”

“Have Happy bring the car around.” Tony was busy smoothing his hair, so he didn’t look up as he mostly did while talking to the AI.

“I cannot do that, sir. Mr. Hogan will, however, arrive at the Tower in between seven and twenty-two minutes, depending on traffic conditions.”

Tony frowned. “Where’d he go?”

“Mr. Hogan drove Ms. Lewis to SHEILD approximately nine minutes ago.”

Tony frowned some more. “Why’s Darcy going to SHEILD? Doesn’t she have interviews today? What’s the media schedule?”

“Ms. Lewis will return here at 2:00 pm, arrive at the CBS studios at 3:00 pm, and be prepared for her interview with Ted Buffington at 5:30 pm. She has tentatively confirmed a short interview with Sally Taylor from _World News_ at 7:00 pm and expects to return to the Tower no later than 9:00 pm. Would you like tomorrow’s schedule as well?”

“Uh, no, thanks, Big J. That’s plenty. Loki, I think that gives you at least one opportunity for an unscheduled drive-by.” Tony turned back to talk over his shoulder.

Loki was frowning. “Time to begin this farce, I suppose.”


	8. To Pretend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “He swears that was totally an accident. And the reporter was fine. The window, however…”

“When we come back from break, we’ll sit down with Darcy Lewis, the girl who would be queen!” When the green light on the camera turned off, Ted Buffington let the obnoxiously cheerful smile drop from his face, then stood and walked to the small green room.

Darcy was sitting on a small sofa with her StarkPad on her lap. On the screen was the photo of her and Loki from dinner the night before. She was trying to psych herself up to be the girl in the photo. The carefree, in-love girl who was the object of Loki’s affection. She had to block out everything else. She could do it. She could be that other girl for the half-hour she had to be here. Then she could be that other girl for an hour or so with Taylor. Then she could go home and take a shower and wash that other girl off and go to bed. It’d be fine.

“Ms. Lewis?” A producer was at the door. “We’re on.”

Darcy closed the StarkPad and tucked it into her purse. “Please, call me Darcy,” she said, shaking his hand. She put on that other girl’s smile and followed him to the brightly lit stage. Her microphone was clipped into place, and the hair person fluffed her just a bit, easing away as the director counted down.

Buffington pasted his own smile back on. “We’re back with Darcy Lewis as promised. Darcy, thanks for being with us this afternoon. I know you’re on a pretty brutal media schedule; are you holding up okay? I hope you’re making time for little outings with your fiancée like last night. The photos of the two of you were everywhere this morning.”

Darcy blushed. “We’re trying to keep my schedule doable, but I’ve always been something of a workaholic. I think Loki’s figured out that he sometimes has to ambush me to make me take an evening off.”

“So, was last night an ambush?”

“He lured me with sushi – he knows I can’t resist.”

“Mr. Odinson hasn’t been doing much media since his little dust-up with Billy Kirkland last month. Do you think he’s going to be more available in the future, or do we need to look into stronger windows in the studio?”

“He swears that was totally an accident. And the reporter was fine. The window, however, was a…” Darcy felt her eyes widen and her mouth drop open, staring into the darkness beyond the nest of cameras.

“Darcy?” Buffington said. “Is everything okay?”

Darcy started giggling, amazed and amused and confused in equal measures. She turned to Buffington. “Speak of the devil,” she said. “He’s over there making faces at me.”

Buffington looked over, squinting against the lights. Loki was settled against the wall in a casual lean, but he grinned at Darcy. “Mr. Odinson?” Buffington said. “Come on over and join us. We’d love to have you.”

Loki didn’t move, but the sound engineer was able to pick up his voice. “Oh, I couldn’t,” Loki said. “I’d hate to upstage Darcy.”

“Oh, that’s bullsh…that’s bull and you know it. You would love to upstage me, you ham!” Darcy couldn’t believe he was there. There and being cute and funny.

“I don’t see what pork products have to do with it,” Loki said, moving around to step onto the set. He was dressed more casually than Darcy had ever seen him, wearing worn jeans, a button-up shirt and scuffed high-tops. He looked _delicious_.

“My love,” he said, kissing Darcy on top of the head. He then reached across to shake hands. “Mr. Buffington.”

Buffington was flustered. So was Darcy. “You’re in a good mood,” she said to Loki. “I didn’t think I’d see you ‘til late.”

“You won’t,” Loki said. He gently tugged a lock of her hair loose and disappeared.

“Man,” Darcy said, reaching up to tuck the hair behind her ear. “I hate when he does that.”

“It must be…” Buffington said, regaining his composure. “Disconcerting?”

Darcy cleared her throat and sat up straighter. “You have no idea,” she said.

The rest of the interviews went well, and Darcy was back at the Tower just slightly after 9:00 pm. Tony and Pepper were in the main living room, watching four different channels, all muted.

“Hey, you,” Tony said. “You did good on _Buffington Live_ today.”

“Hey, guys,” Darcy replied. She was carrying her shoes; she’d had to take them off in the car. “Thanks. Pepper? Do you have trouble with your Zanottis, too? These are killing me.”

“Oh, I should have warned you – Zanottis are only good for nine hours, then they turn into beautiful little torture machines.” Pepper’s face was pursed into a little frown. “I’m sorry I forgot to tell you. Get with me tomorrow and we’ll go through your shoes. We’ll also figure out when we need to do another big shop for interview clothes.”

“We just spent a couple of thousand bucks the other day! I don’t need all of this,” Darcy said. It was getting ridiculous – her closet now had its own room, and Pepper had engaged Jarvis to create an indexing system of what clothing and accessories had been worn where, so she’d never show up in the same outfit twice. Her clothes were worth more money than the cost of her entire college education. And that was before factoring in her shoes.

“That was two blouses and a skirt,” Pepper said dismissively. “And that darling little blue jacket with the… anyway, I’ll arrange something for the weekend. We’ll get you a whole day off, I promise.”

Darcy was too tired to fight about it, and Pepper was right. A woman who was seen as the entire planet’s sweetheart and a future princess really did have to look like one.  It didn’t make her feet hurt less, though. She shrugged and walked off to the elevator, hobbling just a little.

As she passed the library, she saw Loki lying on one of the couches with his socked feet on one armrest and his head at the other. He was wearing his usual dress slacks and button-up shirt, and he was reading from a large volume. She thought about just walking past. She thought about it for too long and he looked up from his book questioningly.

“Um,” she said, leaning on the door. “Thanks for this afternoon. Tony said it went over well.”

“It was nothing,” Loki said. “Mrs. Stark has worked out a schedule, but she prefers that you not see it so you won’t have to fake being surprised.”

“Well, I was really surprised this afternoon,” she said wearily. “I’m going to bed.”

Before she got all the way turned around, she heard him shift a bit. “Are you well, Ms. Lewis?” he asked.

“Yeah,” she said. “I am both peachy and keen.” And then she trudged to the elevator, shoes in hand. Fuck, she was tired.

~*~

**Scene Around Town…**

Prince Loki Odinson seems to be quite smitten with arranged-marriage sweetheart Darcy Lewis of late. In the last three weeks, he’s popped (literally) into interviews on _Buffington Live_ and _the Leo Show_. He’s also been seen squiring his lovely fiancée to lunch at GoGo with Tony and Pepper Stark, Bruce Banner and an unknown (but absolutely gorgeous) redhead, dinners at _Bright_ and _LaKing’s Bistro_ , and one crafty photog caught the lovebirds snuggling in a dark corner of the 18th Street Starbucks, trying to blend in with hipster clothes and sunglasses. Pretty Darcy’s giggle is unique, and her prince had her laughing tears with some quiet words in her ear. The Trickster God probably has a million prank stories to keep his bride smiling.

~*~

**Finally! Joint Interview with Darcy Lewis and Prince Loki Odinson Announced! Geoffrey Sedin Chosen to Ask the Burning Questions**

After more than four months of trying, Geoffrey Sedin has landed the interview of the year – probably of the decade. He’ll sit down with the Prince and his soon-to-be-Princess and see if they can get a few queries in before Odinson either disappears or throws a reporter through a window (it really happened!).

So, readers, what questions would you ask this most powerful of power couples? 

hastalavista@yahoo.com: _Is Loki as hot in bed as he looks like he is?_

lokifangirl@happytown.net: _What’s the low-down on the Lokester? Does that silver tongue come into play in the bedroom? Or any other room in the house?_

momonym@timeout.co.uk: _U guys r all dirty pigs. There’s more to LokiO than sex. He’s a misunderstood genius who needs to find a crazy girl. Im available!_

darcysboy@hyperpath.co.de: _Darcy deserves better than a big fat liar. I’d ask Loki why he’s so mean to Darcy._

rushrush@boogie.com: _Hey, Loki! What’s a good way to turn my dad into a frog?_

**Previous – 1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8…28-29 – Next**

The interview was a disaster. Well, not for everyone, just for Darcy. Loki held her hand as they walked into the studio. As they were introduced to others, he referred to her as his beloved, his lovely lady, his gorgeous girl. While she was having her hair done, he brought her coffee and a scone and fed her bites so she wouldn’t have to move and muss her hair.

In response, she called him honey and nudged against him to demand his arm around her and played with his hair. She straightened his tie and used it to pull him down and rub their noses together.

During the interview, he spoke eloquently of Thor and Jane, and wiped tears from Darcy’s face with his fingers. He pulled her close and kissed the top of her head. He answered a couple of questions to allow her to collect herself, then deftly steered her back into the conversation.

“I feel very lucky,” Loki said, smiling softly at her. “I never expected Darcy in my life.”

“Frankly,” he confided. “I’m not a very good man. I was surprised when Darcy accepted my suit, but I wish to make her glad that she did.”

He smiled at her and squeezed her hand. “When this all started, I was angry. I didn’t want to have a wife; I didn’t want to get involved. I am afraid that I treated Darcy quite badly. She’s been kind enough to forgive me and accept me as a friend as well as her husband. I am humbled by her grace under pressure.”

“The court of Asgard will love Darcy just as much as I do.” He pulled her even closer. “Darcy and my mother will be instant friends. I’m sure Darcy will know all of my embarrassing childhood secrets within the first hours of our arrival.”

Darcy felt like all she did was sit and make cow eyes at Loki. She answered questions and then promptly forgot all about them, cataloging every touch and smile he gave her. She almost forgot the whole thing was a lie – he was so convincing, so earnest, so impish and cute and sweet. And every second she found herself falling more and more in love with him.

Once it was over and they’d said their goodbyes, Loki wrapped his long arms around her and transported her into the living room on the residential floor of Stark Tower. He released her so quickly that she almost fell, but she caught herself on the back of the couch.

Pepper and Tony were in front of the big TV. Darcy slipped down to sit next to Pepper on the couch, and Loki walked to the bar and poured himself a generous drink. He threw the liquor back and set the glass sharply down onto the marble top.

He looked at the others with narrowed eyes and a tight smile. “Pleased, are you?”

“Um, yeah,” Tony said. “That was a masterful perf…”

Loki had disappeared.

Pepper wrapped her arm around Darcy and pulled her head down. Darcy snuggled onto Pepper’s shoulder, quietly accepting the offered comfort. She still felt profoundly stupid, but she felt safe and stupid, and that was an improvement. At least a little.


	9. To Consummate

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wow. How romantic. ‘Hop up here and let me bang you right quick.’ This was going to be epic. Not.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This particular chapter contains gross bastardization of royal titles. Just sayin'.

Darcy changed out of her formal dress and into a simple white silk nightgown. She rubbed her wrist, still feeling the heavy velvet rope from the handfasting. There was no sound from the other room, so she just sat on the huge bed and brushed her hair.

She supposed it was “consummation time”, whatever that meant. There wasn’t much she could do at this point. All of the provisions of the alliance were met, and it was done. She was Darcy of Midgard, Princess Royal of the Realm of Asgard. Which basically meant “that chick who is married to the second son of the King, who is the Prince Royal (not to be confused with the Crown Prince, who is the one who gets to be King when the King dies), who would only get to be King if the King dies and the Crown Prince is incapacitated, which isn’t a problem, because if Odin dies, Thor will totally come out of mourning and be the King, so Loki will never be King and she’ll never have to be Queen, and they’ll call her Princess Darcy”.

Huh. Looked like all her royalty study time with Queen Frigga paid off.

All of this wasn’t making her any less nervous. Suddenly, the lights dimmed to just the fireplace and candles, and Loki was in her doorway. His expression was impassive.

He walked to the bed, pulled Darcy up and took the brush from her hand, placing it on the bedside table. He turned her to face the bed and pushed her gently forward. “I would suggest that you make yourself comfortable, though I will endeavor to take up as little of your time as possible.”

Wow. How romantic. ‘Hop up here and let me bang you right quick.’ This was going to be epic. Not.

She didn’t quite know what to do, so she crawled up onto the bed and laid down on her side, looking at him with both expectation and a tiny bit of fear. She barely had time to take a breath before they were both naked, and he lay down onto the bed. He grabbed her hip and pulled her onto her front, tucking a couple of pillows under her to raise her up.

He knelt behind her, and she could hear his hand on his cock. Great, her ass – her _fantastic_ ass as she’d been told before – wasn’t enough to even give him a partial chub. She felt him press against her.

“Wait, hold it, stop right there,” she said. “Don’t I even get a little foreplay or maybe a nice compliment or something before I give it up? Prime the pump a little, you know?”

“You are responsible for your own pleasure,” he said tightly, then moved forward again.

“Stop!” Darcy said. “Condoms and spermicidal lubricant are in the drawer. Suit up.”

“Between the chemical contraceptives you take, our likely incompatible biologies, and my magic, I believe we are fully protected.” He sounded like he wished she’d just shut up so he could get on with it. Very flattering.

She reached across to the night table drawer and pulled out a box of condoms and tube of lubricant, tossing both back to him. “Nothing is 100% effective, and you _will not_ impregnate me.” She moved as if to push herself off the bed. “No glove, no love.”

“Fine,” he said. A moment later, she felt him pushing at her again. She sighed and tried to relax as he slid into her. Any other time she’d have been impressed with his size, but this was Loki. Her husband. Making a valiant attempt at the least sexy sex on the planet. Any planet. At least he gave her a little time to adjust.

He started moving, their only points of contact his cock in her and his hands gripping her hips. She’d never felt less turned on in her life as he shoved back and forth into her. It felt like he was back there slamming away for an hour, but it was really only a few minutes before he gripped her hips even harder, his motions stuttering.

As soon as he’d finished, he let her go, pulled out, and got up. She could hear him slipping the condom off and tossing it into the trash bin by the bed. She sighed and pulled the pillows out from under her. Before she could even get settled, she heard a muffled roar go up. Holy shit, was that from the feasting hall? Where the wedding party was still going on?

“Oh fucking hell – don’t tell me that was for us?” Darcy was just about to freak out. What the hell? Had motherfucking Heimdall sent out a _press release_?

“Yes,” Loki said. “Heimdall will have let the assembly know that the marriage has been consummated. He will not have given them details.”

“Well, hallelujah for that,” Darcy said. “That wasn’t my best work, and I sure as hell hope it wasn’t yours.” Her only answer was the sound of the bedroom door closing behind him.

Yeah. Epic.

~*~

The next time he came looking for sex, she was ready for him. It was about ten days after the “consummation” fucking, and she guessed he’d gotten tired of his hand. He was either committed to his “no adultery” claim, or no one in the general vicinity was hankerin’ for his mighty sword.

He stood at her door for a moment before walking in. “I wish to…” he started.

“Yeah,” she said. “I get it. We should work out a signal, so I could at least shave my legs or whatever,” she said. “Tie on the door, a reservation?”

Loki frowned at her. “Please stop talking, Ms. Lewis.”

She gave him a wide grin. “Okay, lover boy. Come on over.” She sat on the bed and patted the mattress beside her. He continued frowning at her. “Right,” she said, “assume the position.”

She pulled her nightgown off, making sure to give him a good long look at her boobs before grabbing supplies from the bedside table. She took her time making a nice, fluffy arrangement of pillows, not incidentally wiggling her ass at him. She settled in, pushing one hand down between the pillows and her body. “Bring it on, hot stuff.”

She already had her fingers working against her clit before he finished putting on the condom. By the time he pushed in, she was warmed up. He pistoned in and out of her, and she spread her legs wider, getting herself going.

What the hell, she thought, and let out the moans she’d been holding back, while she ground down against the heel of her hand. “Yeah, okay,” she said. “Yeah, that’s it. Just a little more…” and she came, feeling her body clench around his nice thick cock. He made a noise as she squeezed him, coming himself, apparently unexpectedly.

She continued touching herself as he pulled out and got rid of the condom. “Ms. Lewis,” he started.

“Seriously, Loki,” Darcy said, breathless. “I’m gonna work out one or two more here. Stay or go, but please stop talking.” As she felt her body winding up again, she heard him practically bolt from the room.

That was the last time he came around for a while, and she pretended she didn’t care.


	10. To Reconnect

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Darcy pressed her forehead to Pepper’s collarbone and squeezed her eyes shut. “Everything’s fine,” she said, and then burst into tears.

“Jarvis, where is Pepper?” Darcy asked.

“Mrs. Stark is currently in her upstairs office, and may I be the first to welcome you home, Mrs. Odinson?” Jarvis said.

Darcy clenched her hands into fists. “Could you please not _ever_ call me that again, Jarvis? I’d really, really appreciate it.”

 “Of course, Ms. Lewis. As you wish.”

“Thanks. You’re the best.” Darcy turned to the elevators. Pepper’s office was on the floor below the penthouse, and it was blissfully silent and empty except for Pepper, who was slowly spinning in her chair as she talked on the phone.

The instant she noticed her, Pepper squealed, “Darcy!” and cut off whomever she was talking to, hanging up the phone.

They rushed toward each other, meeting in the center of the room in a tight hug. “It’s so good to see you,” Pepper said. “How are you?”

Darcy pressed her forehead to Pepper’s collarbone and squeezed her eyes shut. “Everything’s fine,” she said, and then burst into tears.

“Oh, honey,” Pepper said. She led Darcy to the couch, petting the other girl’s hair and letting her cry it out. She made soothing little sounds into the top of Darcy’s hair and held her tightly until the hitching sobs subsided and were replaced with sniffles.

Pepper reached over to a side table and grabbed a box of tissues. While Darcy blew her nose and wiped her eyes, Pepper went to her sideboard and poured them each a vodka.

“Bring the bottle,” Darcy said from the sofa. Pepper did, and Darcy threw back her first drink and then motioned for a refill. She threw that one back, too, then put her glass onto the table.

“It sucks,” Darcy said. “The whole thing sucks. In public it’s all sweetness and light, and behind closed doors it’s all shit. I had to come home because I was about to snap and they don’t have shrinks there." 

“Darcy,” Pepper said, dead serious. “Is he hurting you? Forcing you to do anything?”

Darcy shook her head. “Mostly he ignores me or gives me dirty looks. We’ve only had sex three times, and he’s only ever kissed me twice – at our weddings. I’ve only got one friend and his mom to talk to, and I can’t tell them the truth, and I just _miss_ you guys so much and I miss _Jane_ …” She trailed off, wiping her eyes again.

Pepper squeezed Darcy’s hand. “I don’t know what to do,” Pepper said, sounding lost, “and I always know what to do. What do you need?”

Darcy sighed and rubbed her temples. “Okay, since you’re asking. One: Loki and I need a suite with two bedrooms; we don’t sleep together. Two: I need a girls’ night with you and Natasha. Oh, god – it’s going to be so awful without Jane and Maria, but I need you guys. And three: I need an excuse to not go on this European thing with Loki. I just can’t fake it any more right now. I need a few weeks off.”

“Done,” Pepper said. “You stay right here, and I’ll get it all started. That door,” she gestured, “is a full bath with anything you’ll need. I’ll have some comfortable clothes sent up, and I’ll order pizza. Jarvis will handle the room. We can stay here or whatever you want.”

“I want you and Tasha and pepperoni and double cheese and more vodka and a movie with explosions and no romantic subplot. Is there a living room on this floor? I want to hide.” Darcy surprised herself with the list of demands that fell from her mouth. In Asgard she was always so careful about hurting anyone’s feelings or being seen as uncouth. Here, with Pepper and her real friends, she could be pushy and demanding and a pain in the ass and they’d still love her. In Natasha’s case they’d probably love her more.

~*~

Darcy was up to her chin in bubbles and had a gel mask over her eyes when she felt a waft of cool air from the opening door. 

“Just me,” Natasha said quietly.

“Hey, Tasha,” Darcy said.  She groaned when she felt strong fingers rubbing her scalp. It was like heaven. She’d forgotten what simple, honest touches felt like. Loki’s fake touches were confusing. Sif was more given to a friendly arm squeeze or clap on the shoulder. Queen Frigga would squeeze her knee or pat her hand. But this was being touched just to _connect_ in an almost primal way, and Darcy reveled in it.

“Duck,” Natasha said, and Darcy ducked her head under the water, not caring that the eye mask floated away through the bubbles. When she sat back up, Natasha washed her hair for her. “Come out when you’re ready,” Natasha said, and Darcy felt the change in the air as the bathroom door opened and closed again.

~*~

“Pizza’s here,” Pepper said, and Darcy came out of the bathroom. She’d put on the pajamas and slipper socks Pepper had brought, but didn’t bother with makeup or anything else.

She followed Pepper to a small living room where Natasha was putting pizza slices onto paper plates and cracking open icy bottles of beer. Darcy took a long sip of hers. “Oh, that’s good,” she said. “In Asgard they have all this honeyed ale and wine of the gods or whatever, but sometimes a gal just needs a cheap beer.”

“Oh, and pizza,” she moaned, grabbing a slice and folding it in half, hanging her head over the plate as a rain of toppings fell.

They didn’t talk much while they ate, and after two slices and two beers Darcy felt happily sated. She helped clean up, and then went to the bathroom to wash her hands and face. She came back with a brush and sat down to start detangling her damp hair.

“I’ve got it,” Pepper said. “Darce, your hair has gotten so long! It wasn’t this long when you left, and it’s only been six weeks.” She worked on the tangles from the tips of Darcy’s hair, working upward, and when she was through, Darcy’s hair cascaded nearly to her waist.

 “Side effect of Asgard, I think.” Darcy was practically purring under the long, soothing strokes of the brush. “When I’m not all blotchy from bawling like a toddler, my skin is awesome. My nails are a lost cause, though.” She flashed her bitten-down nails at the others, ignoring Pepper’s frown.

“Is anyone mistreating you there?” Natasha asked, and Darcy could hear the silent ‘if so, I will skin them slowly and make the resulting skin into a hat and a nice pair of gloves’.

Darcy took a moment to think. “No, not really. I have a friend. Her name is Sif. She’s the resident warrior-woman. Most of the Asgardian chicks do lady stuff, but Sif is a badass. And the Queen is cool, I guess, but you know, you don’t really want to get deep with your mother-in-law so much.”

“And, Loki?” Pepper sounded just as threatening, but more in a hostile-takeover sort of way.

“It’s…it’s complicated,” Darcy said. “It’s like it was here, you know? In public it’s all lovey-dovey and at home it’s sort of ‘what was your name again?’ He doesn’t have much use for me, I think.”

Natasha was her usual blunt self. “And the sex?”

“All three times?” Darcy asked drily. “I believe his phrase was something along the lines of ‘endeavoring to take up as little of my time as possible’. The first time was the consummation – which that Heimdall dude apparently watched so he could pass the word to everybody at the reception, which was _everybody_.”

“Oh, god,” Pepper said, covering her eyes with her hand. “That must have been…”

Darcy rolled her eyes. “Yeah, _awkward_. But, nobody said anything, so I guess it was SOP. After that, he came around twice; I guess he got tired of his hand.”

“Did he…” Natasha was back with her killer voice, this time silently adding 'and a classic envelope handbag' to her earlier threat.

Darcy huffed. “Of course not. He actually seemed annoyed at himself for needing to. It was sort of wham-bam-thank-you-demi-god. Oh, and get this: apparently, ‘I am responsible for my own pleasure’, too. Thankfully, I’ve had a lot of practice with my hand.”

Pepper sighed and gave her a one-armed hug. “Still, Darcy…”

Darcy waved her hand. “I’m starting to think of him as a sex toy with only one speed, frankly.”

“But you’re still…”

Darcy frowned. “In love with him? Yeah. I must be more of a masochist that I thought. I just sort of pretend that what’s outside is real and what happens at home isn’t. I should be fully psychotic in a couple of decades.”

They talked on through the night, and Darcy felt like she was in heaven.


	11. To Turn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Rough day at the office, honey?”

When he approached her for sex at Stark Tower, she was practically giddy at the thought of her plan. ‘Turn the tables’ Pepper had said. ‘Give him a taste of his own poison,’ Tasha had said. ‘Isn’t it a taste of his own medicine?’ ‘Not in my book.’ Oh, Darcy could do that. She could _so_ do that.

When he stepped through her door, looking frustrated and annoyed, she narrowed her eyes at him. “Rough day at the office, honey?” she asked sweetly.

“Do not test my temper, Ms. Lewis,” he growled, stalking across the room, disappearing her clothes. He grabbed her arm and turned and pushed her onto the bed.

Darcy grinned and got on her hands and knees. “Well?” she said archly. When he climbed up behind her, she could feel that his clothes were also gone. She opened the drawer and tossed him the condoms and lubricant. She was ready when he grabbed her hips and shoved into her, and she moaned loudly.

He snarled wordlessly, and she knew she’d have impressive bruises in the morning.

Darcy got herself braced on one elbow so she could reach under the pillow to pull out her trusty buddy BOB, her battery-operated boyfriend. She slid her hand between her legs, got the vibrator positioned, and then switched it on. She and Loki jolted at the same time, and Darcy ground her clit against the vibrator. Through her haze, she managed to angle herself so that she knew the vibrations were stimulating him, too. She felt Loki stiffen and come, so she let herself come, too, squeezing around him while he was still hard.

Oh, turning the tables was fun. He pulled out, and she rolled onto her side and just replaced his cock with the vibrator, twisting it until she found her g-spot. She came again, her free hand clutching the pillow.

She eased the vibrator out and turned it off, but kept it in reach. Turning onto her back, she arched and brought both hands up to cup her breasts and play with her nipples, slowly warming herself up to another orgasm. She opened her eyes to slits.

Loki was halfway across the room, stopped dead in his tracks, staring at her. “What are…” he spluttered, wide-eyed.

Darcy laughed, low and husky. “I’m doing what you said.” She paused to let out a little moan as she squeezed her thighs together. “You said I was responsible for my own pleasure,” she purred. “I’m just taking responsibility.” She grabbed the vibrator and turned it on, slipping it between her legs. She let her eyes fall closed as she shuddered at the sensations against her already sensitive body.

She almost laughed out loud when Loki threw himself onto the bed behind her, dragging her back to her knees. When he shoved the vibrator away and slammed into her, she turned the laugh into a very heartfelt moan. She was sore and aching and over-stimulated, and his brutal strokes were pushing her higher and higher. She held off as long as she could, but it was only a couple of minutes before she was coming again.

She rode it out, moaning happily and arching under him. He was still going at it when she jerked forward, pulling off. He froze, his dick bobbing in the air and his face the very picture of surprise as she got off the bed. She stretched, arms over her head, and then turned toward the bathroom.

“Well,” Darcy said over her shoulder. “I’m done here. I believe the phrase was, ‘you are responsible for your own pleasure’? Take some responsibility.”

When she got out of the shower, she saw that he had come all over her sheets just to be a dick. She didn’t give a damn – the bed was a freakin’ California king. There was plenty of real estate left to sleep on and savor her sweet, sweet victory. Tables? Motherfucking _turned_. She couldn’t _wait_ to tell Pepper and Tasha.


	12. To Learn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “And before you answer, please remember that I’ve got a direct line to three guys capable of twisting you into balloon animals.”

“So,” Tony said, pulling a chair up to the breakfast table and helping himself to juice and coffee. “How’s married life treatin’ ya?”

Loki glanced at him over the top of his tablet, and then looked back down at the news site he was reading. “Fine.”

“No, seriously,” Tony said. “Are you still being a massive prick to Midgard’s Sweetheart?”

“I remain the same as ever,” Loki said, trying very hard to ignore Tony.

Tony slapped Loki’s tablet down onto the table. “That’s what I’m concerned about, loverboy. I guess it escaped your notice that your wife didn’t come home last night?”

It _had_ escaped his notice, and anger flared through Loki. “Excuse me?” he said. “And how do you purport to know this?”

“Because mine didn’t either,” Tony said. “Natasha, too. They had a little girls’ night up on Pep’s office level – watched movies, ordered pizza, drank beer, had girl talk. I’m just wondering how you missed that. I guess you were sleeping in the other bedroom of that two-bedroom suite Darcy requested.”

Loki narrowed his eyes. “I fail to see where my wife’s sleeping arrangements are of any consequence to you.” He picked up his tablet.

This time, Tony snatched it out of his hand and threw it onto the floor, where it made a loud cracking sound. “The girl’s lost weight, she’s chewed her nails to the quick, and her eyes look like she’s aged fifty years. What are you doing to her? And before you answer, please remember that I’ve got a direct line to three guys capable of twisting you into balloon animals.”

“I have done nothing to her,” Loki said. He was starting to lose his temper. Stark was mistaken. Darcy looked fine. The clean, clear air of Asgard had excellent effects on Midgardians, giving them a bit of the glow of the Aesir. Darcy, too, had benefitted. Hadn’t she? “Darcy does whatever she wants. She has complete freedom to do as she will, whether on Midgard or Asgard. Also, this remains none of your business, Stark.”

“You’re still doing it, aren’t you? You’re treating her like your wife in public and like a whore at home, aren’t you? Ack!” Tony’s rant was cut off by Loki’s hand around his neck and by finding himself dangling a foot off the floor.

“Stark,” Loki growled. “If you ever use the word ‘whore’ in reference to my wife again, I will remove your tongue from your head by way of your nostrils. Are we clear?”

Tony flailed in the air for another moment, clawing at Loki’s wrist. Loki let go, and Tony fell onto the floor, gasping and rubbing his neck. He was, however, smiling. “Protective,” Tony gasped. “Good to know. Maybe you should waste a little bit of that sentiment where your wife can actually hear you. Darcy happens to love you, though god knows why. Would it kill you to be nice to her?”

Loki resisted the urge to kick Tony across the kitchen, but just barely. “I neither need nor want your relationship advice. You would do well to not presume that I do.”

“Okay, okay, big guy,” Tony said, sitting up, but keeping his hands up in a soothing gesture. “Mind my own business, I got it. Little help?” He held out one hand.

Loki stared for a moment, then reached his own hand down to pull Tony to his feet. “You will replace my tablet,” he said.

“Sure thing,” Tony said. He reached into one of the kitchen cabinets and handed Loki a new StarkPad, still in the box.

Loki took it. “Why do you keep these in the kitchen?” he asked.

Tony shrugged. “I keep ‘em all over the place. Hard to know where I’ll be when I break one. You can have the new Jarvis app if you promise not to strangle me anymore.”

“I will try to resist,” Loki said dryly, “but I make no promises.”

Tony went to refrigerator for more juice, and Loki sat at the table, looking at the StarkPad box without really seeing it. Was Stark right? Had he missed changes with Darcy? Was he treating her as Stark had said? But, most of all, love? Impossible. There would be no love in this marriage, of that he was sure. He would not make that mistake, and he would assure that Darcy didn’t either. This was a diplomatic arrangement and nothing else. He was sacrificing one hundred years of his life – granted, it was a blink of an eye to him – to keep favor with Odin and for no other reason.

~*~

It was movie night, and Loki had stayed for most of _Terminator_ before getting bored and heading back to their suite, leaving Darcy to finish the movie with the others.

“Hey, Loki!” Steve called, following Loki down the hall.

“Yes?”

Steve caught up and fell into step next to him. “You know,” Steve said, “you and Darcy don’t have to worry about it.”

Loki was mystified. “Captain, I find myself at a loss; whatever are you talking about?”

Steve grinned and gave Loki a friendly punch to the shoulder. “Out there, during the movie. You shouldn’t feel like you can’t cuddle up with your best girl. Tony and Pepper do, and even Clint and Natasha do it on occasion.”

Loki frowned. “Again, Captain, whatever are you talking about?”

“Wait, you didn’t notice?” Steve cocked his head at Loki. “You’re the only one, then. Everybody can see those longing looks you and Darcy give each other when you think the other one isn’t looking. Man, she’s your wife – you can keep her as close as you want. None of us mind, I swear.”

“I…” Loki said. “I don’t want…I.” He knew he was stuttering, but couldn’t seem to make it stop. Finally, he got control of his voice. “Thank you, Captain,” he said, and watched blankly as Steve bounded away.


	13. To Trust

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Pepper, what do you usually do for damage control when Tony fucks up? We need that.”

“Ms. Lewis.”

“Ms. Lewis.”

“Ms. Lewis.”

“I’m up. I’m up!” Darcy sat bolt upright in bed, scrambling for her glasses on the bedside table. “Jarvis? Is something wrong?”

“In a manner of speaking, Ms. Lewis.” Jarvis said. “ The others are on their way to your suite, perhaps you should get dressed.”

She jumped up and started scrambling for clothes, quickly pulling on a skirt and sweatshirt.  She ran to brush her teeth and pull her hair into a messy knot. She bolted across the living room when someone banged on her door. It was Tony, Pepper, Steve, Natasha, and a very sleepy-looking Clint, who plopped onto Darcy’s sofa and curled up around a pillow.

Pepper hugged Darcy and pulled her down on the loveseat. “It’ll be okay,” she said.

“What?” Darcy said. “Is someone dead? Oh, god – who’s dead?”

“Nobody’s dead, Darce,” Tony growled. “Not yet, anyway. Jarvis, show it.”

The TV lit up, and a photo went up on the screen. It was a picture of Loki, dressed in a tuxedo with his customary emerald silk scarf draped around his neck. The interesting part was the gorgeous blonde woman he was holding by the upper arms as she kissed him. She had the ends of Loki’s scarf in one hand and the other clutching his shoulder. Over her shoulder, Loki’s face was mostly visible.

“I’m gonna kill the fucker,” Tony said, and Steve’s usually smiling mouth was drawn into a tight frown. Pepper kept petting Darcy’s hair, and Natasha looked murderous.

Darcy struggled to her feet, pulling out of Pepper’s embrace. She ran back to her bedroom and grabbed her phone, hitting Loki’s speed-dial number as she came back to the living room.

“Maybe you shouldn’t talk to him while you’re so angry,” Steve said kindly. “Maybe calm down a…”

Darcy gave him a wide-eyed have-you-lost-your-tiny-mind? look. Loki picked up. “Dude,” Darcy said hurriedly. “Pics are on AP; they don’t have headlines yet, but you can be sure they’ll be shitty.”

“Ms. Lewis,” Loki said. “I assure that it’s not what it looks like.”

Darcy rolled her eyes. “Duh,” she said. “I can’t believe you let that bitch get the drop on you, though. You’re gonna have to give up scarves. Hold on.”

“Pepper, what do you usually do for damage control when Tony fucks up? We need that. No, Loki, I’m not saying you fucked up. I can’t believe you didn’t see that coming. Were you sleepy or something? Had too many drinks?” Darcy knew that Loki could tell that she was teasing him.

“Is there anything I can…” Loki started.

Darcy cut him off. “Hole up until we get the counter-story out. Do not go after her, and do not burn down Luxemburg.”

“I’m in Monaco, but I get your point,” he said.

“Whatevs,” Darcy said. “We’ll call you when it’s safe to surface or if I need to get there in a hurry.”

Loki cleared his throat. “I must say, Ms. Lewis, that you have taken this admirably. Your quick thinking is…”

“Yeah, yeah,” Darcy said. “Compliment me when this whole thing is fixed.” She hung up the phone and turned to the others, who were staring at her open-mouthed.

Darcy walked over to the television and pointed. “She’s holding him by his scarf and pulling him forward with his shoulder to make sure his face is in frame; he’s pushing her away by her upper arms, and that expression is not sexy, it’s startled. The whole thing screams set-up.”

“Damn,” Tony said. “Why aren’t you an information analyst at SHEILD?” 

She couldn’t help her little grimace. Maybe in another life, but this one was pretty much sewn up. “Too busy being a trophy wife, I guess.”

Pepper was on her phone, but she put the caller on hold. “We’re working on a plan now.”

“Cool,” Darcy said. “You can be in charge of that. I’m going to be in charge of getting some more sleep. Pepper, if they need any quotes from me, make ‘em up. Make sure you don’t forget to take Clint with you when you go. If Coulson needs me, it’ll have to be after 9:00.”

She smiled tiredly at them. “It’s a fake marriage, but believe it or not, we both take it pretty seriously when it comes to what we agreed to do. God of Lies or not, I trust him: Loki wouldn’t cheat.”

The others stared after her as she went into her room and shut the door. She settled onto the bed and redialed Loki’s cell phone. It went straight to voicemail.

 She punched in her code, and he picked up. “Ms. Lewis?”

“Yep,” Darcy said. “I take it they’ve got your cell number.”

“And the hotel phone, too.” Loki sounded annoyed. “These… _vultures_ … are quite quick, I must say.”

Darcy snorted. “Ha. They were in on it. Somebody paid the chick that kissed you so they could get pictures. Just the sale to AP was probably super-profitable, and they’ll be everywhere before the sun comes up. They’re probably on CNN right now, but I don’t want to hear Andy Cooper’s commentary on my fake love life.”

Thank god for her semi-obsession with celebrity gossip – this had come straight out of the tabloid playbook. Was there no originality anymore? She heard Loki take in a breath in order to speak again, but she really didn’t want to deal with listening to him trying to thank her without actually thanking her while subtly insulting her at the same time.

“I’m going back to bed now. I’ll call you when we have a plan set up. Just stay where you are. If any of your meeting need to be rearranged, Pepper will take care of it.” She paused, and then shrugged. There wasn’t really anything more to say. “Take care,” she said, and then hung up the phone.

~*~

 When she got up, Pepper’s damage control plan was in high gear. Darcy was booked on _Buffington Live!_ for that afternoon. When she went to her massive closet to choose an outfit, she found that everything was too big. The flowing dresses of Asgard must have masked any small weight loss. Oh, well.

She heard someone enter the room. “Pepper? Is that you? I’m gonna need a seamstress…”

Of course, Pepper was a step ahead. She walked into the room/closet; following her was the Russian woman who’d tailored all of Darcy’s clothes the first time.

“Oh, Katia – I’m so happy to see you!” Darcy hugged the woman, trying not to poke herself with the assorted pins Katia had stuck into various parts of her clothing.

“You, too, my dear,” Katia said. “Though I’m told you’ve ruined all of my work.”

“Sorry,” Darcy said. “It’s only a half-size or so!”

Katia gave her a hard look. “Two full sizes, Darcy. You’ve lost at least fifteen pounds.”

“No way,” Darcy said, but she’d been in super-casual clothes since she’d returned from Asgard. Whatever – Katia was a genius, and Darcy had no doubt she’d look awesome. “Do your magic!”

~*~

They wound up choosing a pretty blue wrap dress that was easy to alter quickly, and a pair of shoes with a wild pattern of multi-colored swirls and four-inch heels. Tasha loaned her a coat, and she wrapped one of Loki’s green scarves around her neck. Pepper had called in a manicurist to apply short false nails to cover up Darcy’s bitten-down ones.

When she arrived at the television station, Happy escorted her from the car through a horde of photographers. Happy was perfectly fine with throwing an elbow from time to time to make sure the paparazzi kept their distance

In the makeup chair, the artist complained that Darcy’s skin was so perfect that she needed very little makeup, and the stylist went into rhapsodies over Darcy’s long, thick hair.

“Is there anything I shouldn’t ask you?” Ted Buffington was being overly solicitous, as if Darcy was some sort of wilting flower.

“Seriously, ask anything you want, Ted,” Darcy assured him. “This is gonna be fun.” She let the producer attach her microphone and sat back to wait.

It was time.

“Hello and welcome to _Buffington Live!_ I’m Ted Buffington, and we have with us Darcy Odinson – or should I say Princess?”

Darcy laughed merrily. “Oh, Darcy is just fine. When people call me ‘Princess’ on Asgard, half the time I look behind me to see if they’re talking to someone else!”

“I’d definitely like to talk to you about Asgard,” Buffington said, “but I guess what our viewers really want to know is your reaction to the photos taken in Monaco yesterday.”

The producers put the photo in question up on the screen behind them. Darcy looked at it and giggled. “Sorry, Ted,” she said, “but the expression on his face cracks me up every time! Look at him! He looks like he about to have a seizure.” It was true, and she couldn’t help dissolving into giggles.

“Um,” Buffington said. “You seem to be taking this well?”

Darcy patted his hand comfortingly. “Ted, that’s one of the oldest tricks in the book. A reporter pays some chick to throw herself at a public figure, they have a photographer nearby to catch the shot, and – boom – magazine sales go through the roof.”

“Are you sure?” Ted asked. “I mean, I hope you’re right, but it looks pretty incriminating.”

Darcy smiled. “Um, Mr. Producer Man? Will you put up that picture I gave you?” 

The screen switched to a photo from their Asgardian wedding. Darcy had taken Fandral aside and taught him to use her iPhone camera. It was the wedding kiss. At the time, Darcy had thought it was rather perfunctory, but on further review, it looked pretty heartfelt. “That,” Darcy said, pointing at the screen, “is what Loki looks like when he’s kissing.”

“Oh,” Buffington said, turning in his seat to look at the photo. “That, um, I see what you mean. Is that Thor beside Loki?”

Darcy nodded. It was indeed Thor, though he looked a bit subdued. He wore his armor, but not his cape, and he had a wide black band around his upper arm, an outward symbol of his mourning of Jane. “It is. He was Loki’s honor attendant.”

“And yours? Who is that lovely girl?”

“That’s my friend, Sif,” Darcy said. “And if she ever heard you call her a girl, she’d twist your head off – she’s one of Asgard’s finest warriors. You wouldn’t _believe_ how long it took me to convince her to wear a dress and not her armor!”

Buffington gaped at the photo some more. “Your crown…”

“Gorgeous, isn’t it?” Darcy said. “I love it, but it weighs a ton. It’s solid gold, and the gems are heavy, too. It was made by dwarves – they’re the best jewelers in the Nine Realms. That sucker isn’t everyday wear. I usually just go with a gold circlet that has an emerald in the center. It’s pretty, and _light_ , thank goodness!”

“Well,” Buffington said, obviously a bit stunned. “We’ll have lots more to ask about Asgard when we come back after the break. Stay tuned in for more with Princess Darcy.”

“And…we’re out,” the producer said, and Buffington turned to Darcy. “Well done,” he said. “I mean, brilliant. Are you using Pepper Potts’ damage-control team?”

Darcy smiled slyly. “Oh, hell yes. Though it is true – that was a total set-up. A sloppy one, at that.”


	14. To Confess

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Darcy felt like a dumbass. Here she was, totally in love with her husband.

It was time to return to Asgard.

“I’m gonna miss you guys,” Darcy said. Natasha and Pepper sat on either side of her on the couch, and the various boys were arranged around them.

Steve frowned. “Aren’t you entitled to stay if you want to?”

Darcy smiled at him. “Turn that frown upside down, Mr. Muscles. Loki needs to go back, and the Asgardians don’t really get the concept of married couples living apart. It would cause a huge uproar and a lot of social bullshit.”

Steve pressed his lips together in a line. “I still don’t like…”

“Not your call, Cap.” Darcy kept her voice firm. “I gotta do what I gotta do. Besides, it’s beautiful there, and I miss Sif, and Queen Frigga, and Thor. I’m one of the few people Thor will see, and he’s probably ready for some distraction about now. I promise, it’ll be fine.”

“Well,” Bruce said. “I guess you’ll have to get used to being a Princess again.”

Darcy sighed. “Yeah – the worst part is that I have to make sure that I don’t put my foot in my mouth too many times and make the family look bad. Oh, but when I get back I’m going to make Sif teach me how to fight with a sword!” Natasha perked up at that.

Tony ran his hands through his hair, making it messier than usual. “I’m working on a cell phone we can bounce back to the arc reactor here. That would give you better contact with Coulson.”

“And us,” Clint said quietly.

“Guys,” Darcy said. “I promise, I’ll be back in six weeks. Sooner if the Bi-Arc-Frost-Reactor thingie gets cranking. Now, don’t make me cry. The Loki Express will be here any time now.”

“I’m here,” Loki said, stepping in from the hallway. Everybody jumped except for Darcy. She’d finally gotten used to his abrupt entrances. They all stood, exchanging handshakes and hugs.

“Ready to go?” Loki asked Darcy.

Darcy nodded and stepped close to wrap her arms around his waist. “Let’s roll.” Just before they disappeared, she had a thought: if they named it the Bi-Arc-Reactor-Frost, they could call it the BARF!

~*~

Loki transported them directly to their quarters and gave her a funny look as he released her. She was still laughing about the BARF.

“I brought our things earlier,” he said, frowning. “There’s time before dinner if you wish to freshen up.”

“Awesome,” Darcy said. “I missed my massive bathtub.” When she turned to face him, she was talking to empty air. Status Quo, then.

~*~

The Queen herself came to escort her to dinner. “My dear,” she said. “Things have been too quiet without you here. Join me in the weaving rooms in the morning, and you can tell me all about your visit.”

“Of course, My Lady,” Darcy said. “I’ve kind of forgotten everything you taught me, I’ll probably have to go back to the beginning!”

“Do not despair,” the Queen said. “A new beginning can be a lovely gift.”

Darcy hated it when Frigga was cryptic. She knew the Queen could see the future, but was unable to reveal it. She often wished Frigga would give her hints, but it would never happen, so she just said, “yes, My Lady. 

“Your husband has been with the AllFather discussing the happenings in Midgard. They will join us when they have finished; I’m sure they have much to speak about.” The Queen patted Darcy’s arm one more time before the doors opened and the court rose to their feet, greeting them. 

The Queen strode to the high table, leaving Darcy to get reacquainted with her friends.

Sif immediately crushed Darcy into a hug that lifted her off the ground. “Little Princess,” she said, using her nickname for Darcy. “You have been sorely missed! I find these barbarians of little use without you to boss them around!”

The Warriors Three feigned hurt at Sif’s words, but happily hugged Darcy. Hugging them was similar to hugging Steve – they carefully held back their strength but sometimes managed to smoosh her a bit hard.

Looking up, she spied Loki stepping out onto the dais. He looked much more like himself clad in his green and gold armor, and he seemed more relaxed than he had at their departure.

“Oops!” Darcy said, untangling herself. “Duty calls! I’ll see you all tomorrow. In the afternoon, okay?” 

She picked her way to the high table. Loki took her arm and they remained standing until Odin came out and seated himself on his throne. Frigga settled next to him, followed by Loki and Darcy, and then by the assembled court. Darcy hadn’t missed the pageantry much. Flopping onto the sofas and eating Chinese takeout from the box had been much better.

Loki leaned in close. “Missing your Sesame Chicken?”

Darcy grinned at him. “The squishy green couches, actually.”

“I have no doubt that you will adjust quickly,” Loki said. “Now pretend I said something amusing and charming.”

Darcy beamed up at him, and then motioned him to lean back down. Through her gritted teeth, she said, “thank you, but I know my lines.”

“Apologies, my dear wife.” Loki leaned back up and seated himself more comfortably next to her.

She smiled and patted his hand. And…there it was, back to the nightly sham of being the ‘happily ever after’ couple. It was one of the things she _hadn’t_ missed. On Earth, Loki had been out of town or at SHEILD.

And, much to her dismay, she had actually _pined_ for him.

The few times she saw him, he was almost _nice_. It was as if the photography disaster had at least earned her a modicum of respect that kept him from being a total condescending prick. He never actually crossed over to friendly, but he was less contemptuous.

Darcy felt like a dumbass. Here she was, totally in love with her husband. A husband who most certainly didn’t love her. It was just a matter of time, she thought. Eventually her crazy-in-love-ness would die, and she could at least stop eating her heart out. Maybe a decade? If she was lucky.

~*~

Before dinner, Loki and the King had retired to a small room that Loki remembered well from his childhood. It was where Odin had met with leaders from other Realms, and once he and Thor had passed childhood, they were invited to listen, if not participate. When Loki moved to slip into his usual chair set to one side, Odin stopped him.

“No, son,” Odin said. He gestured to the seat opposite himself, the one that was usually reserved for the other leader.

Loki merely bowed his head and took the seat, but he couldn’t quite believe it.

“Loki, you are the representative of Midgard in Asgard. You sit with me in this.”

Loki had to tighten his control over his voice before answering because of the burst of joy he felt and being considered a worthy colleague. “Yes, my King,” he said evenly.

“Tell me about this ‘media’ that causes so many troubles to the mortals.”

 

 

After the conversation, Odin poured them each a goblet of wine.

“Ah,” Loki said after his first sip. “The Midgardians will never match the vintages of Asgard.”

Odin nodded. “Is there anything at which they excel other than technology?”

Loki thought about it for a moment. “Well, they have a beverage called ‘coffee’ that is quite good, and a cuisine from a large nation called China that Stark and his cohort hold in high esteem. However, not much else stands out.”

Odin gave him a searching look. “They seem to be excellent at providing royal wives, yes?”

Loki drank more wine, but did not comment.

“Did the young Princess enjoy the time with her people?” Odin asked lightly.

“Quite,” Loki answered. He was not going to rise to the bait, though Odin was most definitely fishing.

Odin sipped his own wine. “Thor still mourns deeply. His betrothed was a fine lady. As is your Darcy.” He set his wine aside and walked to Loki, placing a warm hand on his shoulder, squeezing softly. “My son, sometimes it is difficult to see that which is directly beside you.”

“Forgive me, AllFather,” Loki said, setting his wine aside. “The sense of sight is one thing, but the sense of time is something else altogether. Seventy years is but the blink of an eye to the Aesir.”

Odin nodded. “We shall speak again later, son. It is nigh unto dinnertime, and your mother and your lovely wife await.”

~*~

Loki was attempting to slip away after dinner to avoid the drinking and dancing that came after when he was waylaid.

“A word, my Prince?” Frigga touched his arm.

“Of course, my Queen.” Loki held his arm out to her and she took it, leading him to the small anteroom off the throne room. Loki sighed inwardly, knowing he was in for some more familial meddling. What would be next? Was Thor in line to accost him before he could transport himself to his bedchamber?

Frigga sat and gestured for him to do the same. “You and the Princess did well tonight; did you practice being the happy couple on Midgard?”

“No, my Queen,” Loki said. “We had half a planet between us most of the time. The Midgardians do not consider it a slight to not have one’s spouse to heel at all times. It was quite refreshing, really.”

Frigga merely nodded slightly. “The Princess looks well for her time away.”

“Yes, Mother,” Loki said exasperatedly. “It was brought to my attention – quite forcefully – that Darcy was much changed in her time away from her family.”

“I was given to believe that she was an orphan,” Frigga said, tilting her head inquisitively.

“She is, but The Avengers have ‘adopted’ her.” Loki carefully did not look at Frigga when he said the word. “They call her sister, and Agent Coulson considers her a daughter. She refers to them as her ‘family of choice, not chance’.”

Frigga smiled widely. “I do hope she considers us part of that family, too.”

Loki frowned. “You love her.”

“Of course I do,” the Queen said. “It’s rather hard not to. I believe even your father holds a special affection for her, though he pretends he does not.”

“Why?” Loki asked. “Why bother, when her life will be over in an instant? Will you not mourn for her longer than you knew her?”

“It is quite likely, my son,” she said. “But is that any reason to deprive myself of the joy she brings me now?”

Loki swallowed hard, and then drew disdain around him like a cloak. “It is a fine thing, then, that she does not love me, nor I her. She will occupy a brief moment of my life and disappear, as fleeting thoughts do. If you have no further need of me, Mother, I will retire.”

She stood on her toes to kiss his cheek. “I will always have need of you, my child, but I will let you go for now.”

Loki walked away, but stopped after a few steps. Without turning around, he said, “Mother? Do not doubt that I am glad to be a part of this family.” He felt a bit lighter as he closed the door.

 

“You may come out now, my King. Lurking in the shadows suits you ill.”

Odin came out to stand beside her. “Many things can be learned from concealment, my dear.”

Frigga smiled sadly at him. “And many things avoided. He fears much, our Loki, and he fears pain the most.” 

“That, or happiness.” Odin sighed. “He is stubborn.”

Taking his hand, Frigga looked up at her husband. “He gets that from you.”

“And also from you, my love,” Odin said, then kissed her hand and led her away.

 


	15. To Advise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Odin and I ,” Frigga said. “Our marriage, too, solidified an alliance.”

“Princess Darcy,” Frigga said as she approached the low table where Darcy and Sif were playing jacks, a game Darcy had introduced to the court. Oddly enough, Hogun was nearly unbeatable at the game.

“My Queen,” Darcy said, and Sif echoed her.

The queen inclined her head toward them. “Lady Sif,” she said. “May I borrow my daughter-in-law?” Her voice was light, but it was very clear that her question meant, “Beat it, Sif”.

“Of course, my Queen,” Sif said, bowing her head.

Darcy followed Frigga to a small room set up with deep armchairs in front of a fire. Frigga waved for Darcy to sit, but Darcy waited until the Queen was settled first.

“My Lady,” Darcy said, using the name the Queen allowed her to use in private. “Is everything okay?”

“Yes, my dear,” Frigga said. “Is all well with you?”

“No,” Darcy said without thinking, then slapped her hand over her own mouth. “I mean, um, everything’s fine, my Lady. Just fine. Uh, peachy even. Everything’s awesome, truly.”

The Queen smiled at her softly. “There are always moments when marriage is a trial,” she said. “Especially when one has married a complex and often maddening man.”

“I’m sorry, my Lady,” Darcy said. “But I don’t think I can talk to you about Loki.”

Frigga placed her hand on Darcy’s knee and squeezed. She laughed lightly. “Oh, my dear. I was talking about Odin.”

“Oh,” Darcy said, her eyes going wide. “Holy…was your marriage arranged? I mean, if it’s okay to ask that?”

“Odin and I,” Frigga said. “Our marriage, too, solidified an alliance.” Frigga squeezed Darcy’s knee again. “Give it time, my dear. My sons are in many ways opposites, and this is one of those ways. Thor’s heart is easy to read, but Loki protects his with many barriers.”

“Yeah, I noticed that,” Darcy muttered. She sat quietly for a while, thinking. Then, “My Lady? When did you know you’d done the right thing?”

“The day I married, of course. I fulfilled my duty and secured eternal peace for my realm.” Frigga smiled softly. “As to when I knew I’d done the right thing for myself? That took a bit longer.” There was something faraway in her expression as if she was a bit lost in memories. “Odin was – and is – very stubborn, and so am I. It took us a bit of time to come to an accord. Nearly seven centuries.”

“Great,” Darcy said. “So Loki and I will come to an accord six hundred years after I’m dead. Awesome. Something to look forward to.”

~*~

“Little Princess.”

Darcy froze. Sif was the only one who called her that, and Sif did not have a huge, booming, boss-voice. She turned slowly to find freaking _Odin_ at the door.

She was in the little room she’d claimed as her own. It had a couple of squishy armchairs that she’d made Volstagg rescue from a jumble of worn-out furniture, a small bookshelf with a variety of both Midgardian and Asgardian books, and some odds and ends, like her iPod with its til-the-end-of-time battery that Tony had made for her and her crappy attempts at knitting. She had been frowning at a Sudoku puzzle when the king entered.

“Oh, holy crap!” she shrieked. “You scared the…” then she realized to whom she was speaking and jumped up only to bow to him. “Your Majesty! Uh…my King, uh, AllFather, hi!

Oh fuck, she thought, _hi!_ Really, Darcy?! Really?!

“Greetings, Princess Darcy,” Odin said, taking her hand and pulling her to her feet. His hands were _massive_ , and he made her little room look like a dollhouse.

“Okay,” Darcy said, then winced. She was probably never going to get used to Odin. He was scary. He was like Nick Fury times a hundred _and_ immortal _and_ magic. “Uh, would you like to sit down?”

Odin nodded, then sat gingerly onto one of her chairs, not seeming to mind that it was covered with a Hulk-green crocheted blanket that Bruce had made for her as a going-away present, and that he sat so low that his knees stuck up nearly to his ears.

Darcy perched on the edge of her own chair and tried to have good posture and regal bearing. She felt like she probably just looked like she had a crick in her back.

“Rest easy, Little Princess,” Odin said, and with a deep sigh, Darcy settled back into her chair. “I have come only to speak with you in private, and very few know of your hideaway here.”

“Yeah, I mean yes, my King. It’s my little Hobbit-hole. But, oh – pop culture reference, I gotta stop doing that…” Darcy knew she was babbling, but the freaking _King_!

Odin reached out and ran his fingers along the spines of her books, tapping his finger on her leather-bound edition of _Lord of the Rings_. “My wife has read to me from the set of these sent to her by the Man of Iron. Your reference is not lost on me.”

“Tony sent them?” Darcy said.

Odin nodded. “I believe he is attempting to woo my wife in his own very inept way.”

Darcy snorted. “He’s probably not wooing, I promise! He’s got his own queen, and she’s awesome. He _is_ totally inept, though – he asked Pepper to marry him five minutes into their first date!”

Odin smiled gently. “The Lady…Pepper? Must be a woman of uncommon patience to have wed the Man of Iron.”

“She’s awesome,” Darcy said, probably a little overly-enthusiastically. “She can do anything, and she always knows haw to fix stuff, and she can always tell when you need a hug.” Darcy was _horrified_ to realize that she was tearing up in front of the AllFather just because she was talking about Pepper.

Odin reached out and patted her knee, his huge hand dwarfing her leg. “Little Princess,” he said kindly. “Are you unhappy here?”

“No! No, sir, I’m fine,” Darcy said. “I love it here. I love my family here, I swear!”

“And you love my son,” Odin said.

“Of course,” Darcy said quickly. “He’s my husband and that’s what you’re supposed to do, right? I do l-love him.”

Odin patted her again. “You would prefer that you did not, am I correct?”

This time the tears leaked out of Darcy’s eyes. “Please don’t ask me that, AllFather. I don’t, I _can’t_ , talk to you about it – please don’t make me.”

“Do not cry, Little Princess,” Odin said, sounding uncomfortable. “I am not good with…tears.”

She had to laugh at that – men were the same all over about crying women. She wiped her tears away with her fingers. “I’m sorry, my King.”

“You can speak of such things with the Lady Pepper?” Odin seemed a bit more relaxed now that Darcy had her tears under control.

“Yeah. I mean, yes. Her and Natasha. I don’t know if you’d call Tasha a Lady or not – she’s like Sif. She’s a kick-a…I mean a mighty warrior. You’d like her.” It was true; Odin would probably enjoy watching Natasha take on some of Asgard’s finest.

“Would it ease your heart to invite these Ladies to visit you here?” Odin asked.

“Seriously?” Darcy yelped, then flung herself into Odin’s arms, hugging him tightly. “Oh, yes yes yes, AllFather! Can I really? Really?” Darcy was crying again, and Odin patted her back awkwardly.

~*~

Two days later, Loki transported Darcy to Stark Tower. 

When she’d asked him, the question jumbled somewhere in the middle of an epic babble about Pepper and Tasha and Odin and _Lord of the Rings_ , Loki had merely nodded in agreement.

“Tasha! Pepper! Any available superhero!” Darcy called down the hall. “Jarvis?”

“Ah,” Jarvis said. “Princess Darcy, Prince Loki. You are unexpected, but not unwelcome. Mrs. Stark is at SHEILD headquarters, and The Avengers are currently in New Jersey dispatching a sentient landfill.”

“Wow,” Darcy said. “That sounds gross.”

“Merely unpleasant – and pungent,” Jarvis said. “I have contacted Mrs. Stark. She is on her way here. Your suite is, as always, ready, and the main kitchen is fully stocked. Please make yourselves at home.”

“Thanks, Jarv!” Darcy stepped out toward the kitchen, but immediately noticed that Loki hadn’t moved. “Well, come on,” she said. “Don’t you want some Midgardian delicacies while we’re here? I bet there are some Pringles.”

Loki shifted his feet a bit and looked at a point over Darcy’s shoulder. “I will return to Asgard. I will be back in 48 hours to transport you and Mrs. Stark and Agent Romanov.”

Darcy put her hands on her hips. “Look,” she said. “Tony will pitch a fit if he doesn’t get to drag you down to his workshop for a few hours, and Steve will give me his sad-face, and Pepper will give you the ‘manners’ lecture as soon as we get to Asgard anyway. Do yourself a favor. Besides,” she said, hating every word. “I can get my lunch and go to the den so you don’t have to be in the same room as me or anything, if you want.”

Loki opened his mouth to speak, but Jarvis broke in. “Prince Loki? The Avengers request your assistance at the battle site, if you are willing. Master Stark was adamant that you could ‘magic up this thing so it smells like roses and send it off somewhere else’. I have coordinates and satellite references for you if you wish.”

Loki gave a fake put-upon sigh. “Inform Stark that I will assist, but that the smell of roses makes my head hurt. He should lead the others in brainstorming additional scent options until I arrive.”

He looked toward Darcy again. “It seems that I am needed, Ms. Lewis,” he said. “I’m sure you won’t miss me.” He disappeared.

Darcy went to the kitchen.

~*~

When The Avengers returned, they were filthy and smelled like lavender.

“Oh, yuck!” Darcy said, and at the same time, Pepper said, “Ewww!”

“Showers, showers, showers – everyone!” At Pepper’s barked order, they trooped obediently to their floors.

Loki was, of course, pristine. Darcy was standing close to where he’d popped in, and couldn’t stop herself from leaning close. “You don’t smell like lavender,” she said. “You just smell as good as always.” It took her a second to realize what she’d said. “Oh, I mean… uh, you smell fine. No lavender.” She backed swiftly away. “Fuck,” she whispered under her breath. “Pepper!” she said desperately. “Look, Loki’s here!”

Pepper picked up on her desperation and gave Loki a welcoming smile. “Hello, Loki,” she said.

“Mrs. Stark,” Loki said in greeting, and he blinked rapidly when Pepper jumped up and hugged him tightly. He patted her back awkwardly, and Darcy giggled at the gesture so reminiscent of his father’s.

“Thanks for agreeing to take us to Asgard,” Pepper said, stepping back. “I can’t wait to see it and meet your family!”

Loki inclined his head toward her. “My King commands,” he said.

Just then, Natasha, her wet hair tucked behind her ears, came into the kitchen, and Loki stared as she strode quickly across the floor to crush Darcy into a tight hug. Loki could hear her whispering into Darcy’s hair in what he assumed was her native tongue. “I have missed you, little sister.”


	16. To Visit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Hey, guys! These are my friends, Pepper and Natasha.” She pointed to the others in turn. “This is Sif, Volstagg, Hogun, and Fandral, who is a smarmy manwhore. Please don’t kill him, Tasha. He doesn’t know any better.”

“Oh, wow,” Pepper moaned. “I think I’m gonna barf.”

Natasha cursed in Russian.

“Deep breaths, guys. Deep breaths! Sorry, I forgot how nauseating it can be the first few times.” Darcy let go of Loki’s arm and rubbed Natasha and Pepper’s backs softly.

After a moment, both women straightened up, obviously feeling better. Loki had transported them directly to the guest quarters. As soon as Darcy released him, he disappeared again.

“He does that a lot?” Natasha asked.

“Pretty much always,” Darcy said sadly. “He’s not big on, well, being around me.” She saw the look that Tasha and Pepper exchanged, but ignored it as best she could.

“Good god,” Pepper said. “This place is unbelievable!”

“Ixnay on the odgay,” Darcy said. “There are a lot of those wandering around up here.”

Pepper ducked her head sheepishly. “Oops! But Darcy – this is incredible.”

Natasha was wandering the suite, and Darcy could tell she was trying hard to stay unimpressed.

Darcy pointed out the bedrooms, bathing room, balcony, sitting room, library, and – best of all – the carved wooden wardrobes. “When I first opened one of these things I thought I’d go to Narnia! I had them get you guys a bunch of stuff. Most of it should fit.”

“How do I know what to wear!” Pepper wailed, and Darcy, for once, found herself advising Pepper.

“I’ll tell you, of course!” Darcy opened the wardrobe and started pulling things out. “So, look,” she said. “This side is all daytime stuff, and this is all dinner wear. Way in the back is the really sparkly stuff for parties. The drawers over here are jewelry, shoes are down here, and there’s all kinds of crazy underwear in the baskets.”

Natasha and Pepper stared at her, open-mouthed. 

“Yeah,” Darcy said. “They had someone teach me all about it at first, too. If I really mess up, Loki usually catches me before we leave. These people are pretty invested in tradition. Now,” she clapped her hands together. “Put on day dresses and the least fancy jewelry and the little slipper shoes. We’ll go explore. You won’t meet the family until just before dinner.” 

Darcy whirled off toward her own rooms, only looking back once to see Pepper and Natasha struck dumb. Awesome!

When Darcy returned, they were ready to go. Natasha was wearing the wrong shoes, and Pepper had her sash on backward, but those were easy fixes. 

~*~ 

Darcy helped Tasha and Pepper through their first court dinner, but they both adapted quickly. It was a skill they each used daily, just in slightly different ways. The AllFather took a particular liking to Pepper, which threw Loki in a big way.

“I would have thought Odin and Agent Romanov would be more suited as friends, but Lady Natasha and my mother seem to have much to say to one another. Should I be concerned about the implications of that?” Loki had leaned in to speak to her, and he smelled _fantastic_. There had to be something that kept grabbing her attention. Magic pheromones, maybe? She almost missed the point because she was so busy trying to not throw herself into his lap. 

“Oh,” she said, bringing herself back. “Be afraid; be very afraid.” 

He kissed her temple before pulling away. Darcy caught Pepper’s glance and near-invisible frown, but only shrugged back.

After dinner, the tables were pushed back, and casks of wine and ale were moved in. A group of musicians started warming up in one corner, and the King and Queen excused themselves from the festivities. Darcy caught one of Natasha’s and one of Pepper’s hands and pulled them into the building fray.

“Little Princess!” Sif called, rushing toward them. Darcy hugged her tightly, allowing herself to be swept up and swung around. She felt herself being passed off to Volstagg, who squeezed her before setting her on her feet. Fandral was already approaching Natasha with a gleam in his eye when Darcy intervened.

“Hey, guys! These are my friends, Pepper and Natasha.” She pointed to the others in turn. “This is Sif, Volstagg, Hogun, and Fandral, who is a smarmy manwhore. Please don’t kill him, Tasha. He doesn’t know any better.”

Natasha looked over her shoulder and narrowed her eyes. “Prince Loki,” she said smoothly, “won’t you join us?”

Darcy knew Loki had been a mere step from escape, and she knew that Tasha’s timing was deliberate.

Loki slowly turned toward them. “My dear Lady Natasha. I was just going…”

“To ask me to dance,” Pepper broke in. As if on cue, the music started up and couples rushed to the dance floor.

Loki sighed, but held out his hand to her. “My Lady,” he said mildly.

Natasha allowed Fandral to escort her into the dance. Sif and Volstagg sprinted into the crowd, and Darcy found herself face to face with Hogun. Many called him ‘Hogun the Grim’, but Darcy was always able to get what she called a ‘stealth smile’ out of him. The smile barely touched his lips – it was all in the eyebrows.

He held his hand out to her. “A dance, my Princess?”

“Anytime,” she said, and pulled him along. 

~*~

After dancing with Pepper, Loki was immediately caught by Natasha. “You can’t leave yet,” she said, and he winced a bit at the strength of her hold on his arm. “I can’t let you go without a dance.”

“Of course,” Loki said, though he desperately wanted to transport himself back to his chambers and away from the heat and smells of the dance floor and the party itself. All of the court expected him to only make a brief appearance before spiriting himself away. It had always been thus, from his childhood on. Loki did not _do_ parties.

“Are you enjoying your stay on Asgard so far?” he asked politely, not caring about the response. 

Natasha smiled up at him; it was a smile that had made strong men run away. “It is beautiful,” she said. “But I didn’t come here for the scenery. I came here for Darcy.”

“Ah,” Loki said, but he didn’t rise to any sort of bait or let her icy smile perturb him. He’d seen worse. He’d done worse.

“The two of you seemed…close at dinner.” Natasha had picked up the steps to the dance about 90 seconds into her turn around the floor with Fandral, so she was able to keep up even when Loki tried to speed up to distract her. 

“Yes, we did _seem_ so,” Loki said. “That’s the point.”

“It doesn’t have to be that way.” Natasha’s voice was as mild as always, but her tone was dead serious. “She loves you.”

“She’s dying,” Loki snapped. “Every day a little more, so _feelings_ are irrelevant. Thank you very much for your input, Agent Romanov, but I do not need your assistance to keep my house in order.” He had worked them to the edge of the dancing crowd, so he was able to step back from her and let go. “I must be off,” he said, and then disappeared.

 


	17. To Understand

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki’s mind was racing as he walked down the long corridor from the Grand Hall. After eight steps, the pieces clicked, and he sprinted to his own quarters with a grin splitting his face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're coming down the home-stretch. There's a little nod to "Firefly" here, just 'cause.

Loki had been summoned. A guard had come to his quarters and delivered the message, then marched away. As far as Loki knew, he and the AllFather had exhausted all topics related to Midgard and the arc reactor. Explaining the media had been a bit of a challenge, but they had worked it out.

“Yes, my King,” Loki said, bowing to the throne.

“Loki,” Odin intoned. “You have acquitted yourself well in your service to Asgard on Midgard. The mortals feel that you have made appropriate reparations to them through the completion of the alliance.” Odin frowned. “The peace with Jotunheim holds, though it is a fragile one, and you have been banned from their realm for all eternity.” 

“Yes, my King,” Loki said, knowing that there was still something coming. The AllFather had addressed all of the victims of his crimes save one: Asgard herself.

“Much has been done to restore you as a son of Asgard, but there are still those who feel that you are not capable of giving our people what they need from you as things now stand.” Odin sighed. “It is my decree that you will not partake of Idunn’s apples on Harvest Day.”

Loki blinked several times, and then answered, his voice wavering slightly. “Yes, my King.”

Odin gave his son a hard look, and then nodded tightly. “You are dismissed.”

Bowing, Loki backed his way from the chamber.

A moment after the Grand Hall’s doors closed, Frigga came out from behind Odin’s throne. She hitched her hip against the throne’s arm so that her head was level with her husband’s.

“I’m sorry you had to do that, my love,” she said, leaning her forehead against Odin’s. “I know that it hurt you deeply.”

He sighed, but then smiled. “All will be well,” he said. “They do not have seven hundred years to wait for their friends to lock them into a storage room together and not release them until they have worked it out.”

Frigga smiled back. “You are truly wise, my King,” she said, and then kissed him on the end of his nose.

~*~

Loki’s mind was racing as he walked down the long corridor from the Grand Hall. After eight steps, the pieces clicked, and he sprinted to his own quarters with a grin splitting his face.

Loki slammed into the room, looking wild. “Holy shit, what?!” Darcy squeaked as she jumped up from her desk. “What happened? Have you gone evil again or something? You look like a maniac!”

She thought she would jump out of her shoes when he ran up to her and grabbed her by her upper arms. Shit, he really had gone evil, and he was going to strangle her or something. He stayed still, though, and she looked closer. He looked like a maniac because he was smiling. Not his sexy smirk or his sly grin, but _smiling_. Ear-to-ear, excited, thrilled, crazy-happy smiling. Darcy raised her eyebrows, and then very tentatively smiled back.

This is what going insane feels like, isn’t it? she thought, as he crushed her to his chest in a tight hug. 

“Darcy,” he whispered into her shoulder. “Darcy.”

She took in a quick breath. He never called her by her name. It was always ‘Ms. Lewis’. “L-Loki? What’s going on?”

Loki pulled back, holding her at arm’s length. “I’m going to die!” he said.

Darcy was truly thrown. “Um, yay?”

“My beautiful idiot,” he said, much too fondly for a true insult. “I have been denied Idunn’s apples. I will age at a similar rate to you, and then I will die.”

“Still not getting it over here,” Darcy said. “And don’t call me an idiot, you prick. Now let go of me.”

He released her, but only long enough to sweep her up into his arms and carry her to his bedchamber. “My darling,” he said, placing her gently onto the bed. “I look forward to you calling me names for approximately seventy more years, but by then we will have grown old together and I will not mind so much.”

He leaned in, and Darcy slammed both palms against his chest to push him back. “Easy, tiger: hold the phone; stop the presses; do not pass ‘go’, do not collect $200. What. The fuck. Are you. Talking about. Loki?”

She nearly had a heart attack when Loki jumped up on the bed to sit next to her and gathered both her hands into his. “The AllFather has denied me Idunn’s apples! I will no longer be immortal. Though the Aesir aren’t actually immortal, we just age very slowly, and…”

“Loki, you’re babbling, and that’s usually my gig. Can you please slow down and catch me up on whatever the hell you’re talking about?” Darcy was close to crying from abject confusion. Loki was dying? She was dying? Aesir weren’t immortal? There were apples? He couldn’t have them? This was good? “You’re really freaking me out.” She felt a tear spill over onto her cheek.

Loki took a deep breath, and then another. He reached out and gently wiped the tear from her face. “My apologies,” he said. “Let me explain. I have treated you abysmally…”

“Yeah, I know. I was there for that part,” Darcy said, trying to pull away.

Loki held on. “Please hear me out, my dear. After, you may send me away if you must, but I pray that you do not.”

Darcy let her hands relax. “All right,” she said. “Say it.” 

“The Aesir are not actually immortal. Once a year we eat a golden apple from Idunn’s orchard, and it slows the aging process.” He paused for a breath. “Today, Odin informed me that I would not partake of Idunn’s apples.”

Darcy nodded. “I’m with you so far, but being off the Apple List is a punishment, right? Isn’t it like a death sentence?”

“Yes!” Loki said, as if a death sentence was the best thing since chocolate-chip-cookie-dough ice cream. “I will live a mortal-length life of approximately seventy more years.”

“Okay,” Darcy said, her breath hitching. “Still confused. Can you break this down to single-syllable words, maybe use finger-puppets?”

Loki giggled. Giggled! WTF? “I will live as long as any mortal would. I will not have to mourn you for thousands of years when you die. I can express how much I love you without fearing for my sanity after you are gone. I can die.”

Darcy frowned, then smiled, and then grinned. Her tears began to spill over. “You love me?”

“Yes,” Loki said. “I do. I have all along.”

“You fucking asshole!” she yelled. “You treated me like crap for a _year_! You blew me off like a thousand times! You talked to me like I was an idiot! You only ever called me by my last name! You gave me terrible sex! And you’ve never even kissed me when we weren’t getting married! I hate you!”

“Darcy…” he began, but she cut him off.

“You owe me a million fantastic orgasms, and you have to tell all our friends why you’ve been such a dick.” Her smile was breaking through, but the tears kept falling. “You have to tell me I’m beautiful every morning for the next seventy or so years, and I’m going to think of a whole bunch of other stuff, too. I _own_ you, buddy.”

Loki let go of one of her hands so that he could spread his hand over his chest. “This I so swear,” he said in a strong, reverent voice that was so overwhelming she closed her eyes. “I swear, Darcy. I will do all of these things if you will allow me to stay with you and make up for all the pain I have caused.”

She pressed their foreheads together for a moment, and then opened her eyes to see that there were tears in his, also. “Okay,” she said. “I will.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A kind reader pointed out that I forgot a minor (by which I mean massively enormously huge) detail from Norse mythology here regarding immortality and species. I ask that you please put on your disbelief suspenders and forgive me for being something of a dunce.


	18. To Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The boots were gone so quickly that he actually dropped the couple of inches to the floor as they disappeared.

 “May I kiss you?” Loki asked, and there was a little tremor of emotion in his voice, like he was afraid she would refuse him.

“Absolutely,” Darcy said, pulling at his arms to make him stand. She stood in front of him, her body brushing against his all the way up, though neither of them could feel it through Loki’s armor.

“Get rid of the armor,” Darcy said, “but keep your regular clothes on. I want to take them off you.”

That made Loki draw a breath in, but he did as she said, sending the armor away. Darcy reached out and untied the lacing of his shirt, gently touching each inch of skin she uncovered. His skin was so soft over the hard jut of his jaw and along the cords of his neck.

“Take off your boots,” Darcy said. He was so tall with them on. She needed him closer; she wanted to get her mouth on the skin of his neck. The boots were gone so quickly that he actually dropped the couple of inches to the floor as they disappeared.

Loki bent his head to her. “May I kiss you now, love?” he asked.

“Say my name again,” she said, wanting the deep shiver his voice caused in her.

“Darcy,” he rumbled, “Darcy. Darcy. A kiss, my lady?”

She finally turned her face up, and he cupped the back of her head in one hand, pausing only a moment to smile at her.

His mouth on hers was soft and sweet at first, but the kiss built with all of the yearning and suppressed emotion they’d both been trying to hide. Loki gently laid her down on the fluffy pillows, following to cover her without breaking the kiss.

Darcy pushed him back a little, opening space between them. “I love you, too,” she said, her breathing deep and erratic. “I have for a very long time.”

Loki buried his head in the crook of her neck. “I have been a fool,” he said, his voice muffled. “I could not face the thought of outliving you for centuries. I had convinced myself that I did not, and would not, love you.”

“It’s okay,” she said, stroking the back of his head, smoothing down his thick hair. “I mean, that was a total dick move, but I think I understand.” It had been a year. A miserable year, sure, but not time they couldn’t make up for. They had time. Not all the time in the world, but a full lifetime’s worth.

He raised his head, and then put a little more space between them so he could look her in the eyes. He pulled back further and slid off the bed, landing on one knee. “Darcy Lewis,” he said. “Will you marry me again?”

Darcy propped herself on her side facing him. “I will, but I want a new ring. And a new dress. And a new wedding. And some new shoes.”

“Everything new?” he asked. 

“Exactly,” Darcy confirmed. “Except for you; I’d like the same old groom, please. Now get up here and let’s re-consummate this bitch.”

Loki jumped back onto the bed, rolling her onto her back and propping himself above her. This time, he stripped them both with a thought. She considered complaining that she’d not gotten to undress him herself, but he started kissing his way from her neck across her chest and down to the valley between her breasts and she forgot all about it.

“Darcy,” Loki said softly against her skin, “you are beautiful.”

He kissed further down, and she arched and gasped as he kissed and sucked her breasts before moving down her body. She was so far gone in a sensual haze that she didn’t realize that he’d slipped down between her spread legs until his tongue touched her clit.

“Oh, fuck,” she gasped, and hitched her hips up. “More. Please, Loki.”

God, she could _feel_ him smile against her, and gasped again. “More.” This time, she demanded.

He spread her open and pushed his tongue inside, making her gasp. He pulled back and slid his fingers into her. He alternated his fingers and his tongue until she was curled up over him, her hands shoving his head against her.

He broke away and crawled back up her body, gasping for breath and laughing. “Let me breathe, vixen, or this will not end as we both hoped!”

He wiped his face on her belly, and she was laughing, too. Darcy cupped his chin and pulled him all the way up. “I love you,” she said, still marveling that she could say it. Out loud. To him.

“And I you,” Loki said, arranging himself over her and wrapping her leg around his waist. When he pushed inside her, he pressed their foreheads together. “I love you, Darcy Lewis.”

Darcy arched against him, trying to get him to move, and he did. His first thrusts were slow and deep, but Darcy wanted more. Yes, there was something to be said for sweet and gentle, but she needed his passion and his barely-controlled strength. He seemed to understand, and sped up.

She wrapped her other leg around him, giving him more room to kneel up and fuck her harder. “Yes,” she moaned. “Oh, yeah.” She moaned louder when he pressed his face to her throat and sucked at the skin there. She knew he was leaving a mark and was fiercely glad.

“Darcy,” Loki said against her neck. “There are so many things I want to…”

“Yeah, yes, okay,” Darcy said, pulling him up to look him in the eyes. “Everything, all the things, I swear. But right now I really want that first fantastic orgasm you promised me, and I want it hard.”

Loki looked back at her, a smile crinkling the corners of his eyes. “You are extraordinary, my love.”

She was just about to flip them over and take the reins when he kissed her. But his mouth, his tongue, the way he kissed her like he wanted to taste every inch of her, made her melt back against the sheets.

“Please,” Darcy said. She held his lean hips and arched up against him, trying to get him to move within her. Finally, he got the picture and started thrusting again, but slower this time, until she dug her nails in. Then he took over, strength and heat and glorious friction, and she met him move for move.  

Soon, too soon, his thrusts became erratic, and she felt her orgasm coiling tightly in her stomach.

"Darcy!" he gasped, and tried to slow down. "Wait, please, I can't..."

"No," Darcy said. "Don't stop. If you stop I will kill you."

She started slipping her hand down between her legs, but he stopped her.

“Let me,” he said. “Mine.”

Darcy felt no need to complain, and just arched harder, crying out as he pushed her over the edge. She was still coming when his hips stuttered and he stilled above her, groaning “Darcy” and “love” and “mine” against her neck.

He rolled off of her and gathered her to his side while they caught their breath. Darcy kissed his sweaty shoulder. “I think I’m going to like being married to you,” she said.


	19. To Live

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Darcy lifted the lid and looked at what was revealed. “Not exactly lox and bagels,” she said.

They spent all of Harvest Day in bed. They heard the happy chatter of the courtiers leaving for the orchards, and took advantage of the ensuing silence to have extremely loud sex, admiring the way the noises bounced and echoed off the stone walls. When the others came back in the late hours from the Harvest Festival, Darcy and Loki were happily curled up in their blankets, fast asleep.

Just past sunrise, a servant knocked at the door to their chambers. Loki put on a pair of trousers and answered. A valet was standing there, holding a covered tray. “From your parents, the King and Queen.” Loki took the tray and waved the man off.

He carried the silver tray into the bedchamber, where Darcy was sitting up in the bed, rumpled and sleepy with the sheets wound around her.

“What’s up?” Darcy asked.

“Breakfast in bed,” Loki said, holding the tray out to her with a flourish.

Darcy lifted the lid and looked at what was revealed. “Not exactly lox and bagels,” she said.

Loki looked at the tray, then to her, then back to the tray. Which held two golden apples resting on a silken napkin. He very carefully set the tray down on the bed and reached for the folded piece of parchment that was next to the apples. He recognized his mother’s handwriting…

_Beloveds,  
_

_Today is, in fact, **not** the Harvest Day. _

_With much love,_

_Your Mother and Father_

Darcy picked up one of the apples and turned it over in her hands. She held the apple up in front of her eyes. “It looks likes a Golden Delicious. Wait, are these…”

“Idunn’s apples,” Loki said quietly on an exhaled breath. He handed her the note.

“What does it mean?” she asked, frowning.

Loki surprised her by laughing. “Oh,” he gasped. “The AllFather has his own mischief; I would do well to remember that! Odin said, ‘you will not partake of Idunn’s apples on Harvest Day.’ And, as my mother has pointed out, today is _not_ the Harvest Day. I should listen closely to the words of the All…to the words of my father.”

“So, what do we do?” Darcy asked.

Loki picked up his own apple. “If you would have me for even longer…

He was answered by the crunch of Darcy taking a huge bite of her apple.


	20. To Promise

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the last little bit - thanks for reading. I had a blast writing it.

“Will you, Darcy Elizabeth Lewis, take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband? To love and to honor, to have and to hold from this day forward, as long as you both shall live?”

“I will,” Darcy said, her voice strong and clear.

“And will you, Loki Odinson, take this woman as your lawfully wedded wife? To love and to honor, to have and to hold from this day forward, as long as you both shall live?”

“I w-will,” Loki said; his voice only shook a little. Then, “I will,” his voice ringing out with certainty.

They exchanged rings, Darcy giving Loki a thick gold puzzle ring, and Loki slipping a delicate circle of diamonds onto her finger.

The newly Internet-ordained Reverend Bruce Banner said, “Then by the power vested in me by the Avengers, SHIELD, and Get-Ordained-Online-Today Seminary dot com, I now pronounce that you are husband and wife. Loki, you may kiss your beautiful bride.”

Loki lifted the veil from Darcy’s face, and then bent her low over his arm to kiss her soundly.

There were wolf-whistles from Clint and Tony, accompanied by slaps to the arm by Natasha and Pepper respectively.

The guests stood and applauded, and Darcy took Loki’s arm and walked back up the aisle at his side.

 

~end


End file.
